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My ex-wife has never broken 150. I wish she would stop telling people I taught her how to play golf.

Bruce Lansky

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Bruce Lansky
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Someone once told me that there is more to life than golf. I think it was my ex-wife.
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I'll always remember the day I broke ninety. I had a few beers in the clubhouse and was so excited I forgot to play the back nine.
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My psychiatrist prescribed a game of golf as an antidote to the feelings of euphoria I experience from time to time.
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When your first baby drops her pacifier, you sterilize it. When your second baby drops her pacifier, you tell the dog: 'Fetch!'
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