Quote

I used to go to the driving range to practice driving without slicing. Now I go to practice slicing without swearing.

Bruce Lansky

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Bruce Lansky
Slicing
Swearing
Range
Driving
Golf
Practice
Used
Without

More quotes by Bruce Lansky

Image
Talking to a golf ball won't do you any good, unless you do it while your opponent is teeing off.
Bruce Lansky
Image
Some golfers fantasize about playing in a foursome with Arnold Palmer, Jack Nicklaus, and Sam Snead. The way I hit I'd rather play in a foursome with Helen Keller, Ray Charles, and Stevie Wonder.
Bruce Lansky
Image
The only thing in my bag that works is the bug spray.
Bruce Lansky
Image
In Minnesota it's so cold some nights you have to wear two condoms.
Bruce Lansky
Image
I'll always remember the day I broke ninety. I had a few beers in the clubhouse and was so excited I forgot to play the back nine.
Bruce Lansky
Image
When your first baby drops her pacifier, you sterilize it. When your second baby drops her pacifier, you tell the dog: 'Fetch!'
Bruce Lansky
Image
Someone once told me that there is more to life than golf. I think it was my ex-wife.
Bruce Lansky
Image
What's the point of washing off your ball when teeing off on a water hole?
Bruce Lansky
Image
My psychiatrist prescribed a game of golf as an antidote to the feelings of euphoria I experience from time to time.
Bruce Lansky
Image
On a recent survey, 80 percent of golfers admitted cheating. The other 20 percent lied.
Bruce Lansky
Image
The only place you're sure to find love is at the end of a letter from your mother.
Bruce Lansky
Image
My ex-wife has never broken 150. I wish she would stop telling people I taught her how to play golf.
Bruce Lansky
Image
We learn so many things from golf: how to suffer, for instance.
Bruce Lansky