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When a soldier of the night's watch dies they say, And now his watch is over. That's what they say when a comedian dies. They go, And now his tour is done.

Brad Williams

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Brad Williams
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More quotes by Brad Williams

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I don't want to be mean. I try not to be.
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I try not to be hateful.
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I was always the funny guy. Everyone wants to hang out with the funny guy.
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I'm such a damn workaholic, that it's interesting to be like, Oh, what do I do for fun?
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I want to go to Australia so bad, do comedy there, and see the people there. It's a great country. I have friends that are Australian that have told me all about it. I want to do comedy there.
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I don't know, why am I called the opposite of what I am? It's very confusing to me.
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Yeah, people do need to realize that just because they've seen me perform for an hour does not mean that we are now close.
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When you talk about modern comedy I think there's a big three right now, and that's Louis C.K., Bill Burr, and Jim Jefferies. I don't think anyone's doing it better than those three guys.
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Every now and then we're going to fail.
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The vast majority of people that have gotten mad at me for a joke that I've made were people that were, A, never going to see me in the first place, or, B, were dragged to see me by somebody else.
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I'm in awe of comedians that do things that I can't do, whether it be a one-liner comic like Anthony Jeselnik, whether it be social issues commentary, whether it be - hell, Carrot Top. I can't be Carrot Top. I can't.
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It's extremely important for people to be informed and to be educated and to know what's going in their community and in their country, but every now and then you just kind of want to turn the brain off for a little bit and just laugh and be silly.
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I kind of want to know a little bit about everything.
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I like to talk about very different topics. I like to jump around a lot because I don't want people to come see me and then for an hour I tell jokes about being a little person. I just don't want that to happen. I understand that it's part of me, that's the first thing that you notice and it's something that people are curious about.
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I don't get all the anger that is thrown at comedians.
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People ask me a lot like, Hey, so when are you done with your tour? Like when I die. That's when I'm done with my tour.
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I'm funny because I'm funny. And there's more to offer.
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It's very confusing to me why people take comedians so seriously.
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I'm not going to talk too much politics because I'm not smart enough to do that.
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I don't think I'm extremely intelligent by any means.
Brad Williams