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Yeah, people do need to realize that just because they've seen me perform for an hour does not mean that we are now close.
Brad Williams
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Brad Williams
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More quotes by Brad Williams
People ask me a lot like, Hey, so when are you done with your tour? Like when I die. That's when I'm done with my tour.
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There are plenty of wonderful, good fat people in the USA that have no problems being fat, who I have no problems with being fat.
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I don't want to be mean. I try not to be.
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I try not to be hateful.
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It takes a surprisingly large amount of intelligence to be a professional idiot.
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The vast majority of people that have gotten mad at me for a joke that I've made were people that were, A, never going to see me in the first place, or, B, were dragged to see me by somebody else.
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If you got a hit every third time that you went up to bat in the major leagues, you'd be the greatest hitter of all time. I think my average is a little better than that.
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When a soldier of the night's watch dies they say, And now his watch is over. That's what they say when a comedian dies. They go, And now his tour is done.
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I'm in awe of comics that do things that I can't do, or haven't tried doing yet.
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Every now and then we're going to fail.
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I want to go to Australia so bad, do comedy there, and see the people there. It's a great country. I have friends that are Australian that have told me all about it. I want to do comedy there.
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It's extremely important for people to be informed and to be educated and to know what's going in their community and in their country, but every now and then you just kind of want to turn the brain off for a little bit and just laugh and be silly.
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I was always the funny guy. Everyone wants to hang out with the funny guy.
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I kind of want to know a little bit about everything.
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I don't know, why am I called the opposite of what I am? It's very confusing to me.
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I would love, obviously, just to keep doing stand-up. That's the constant. That's the thing that I'm going to do for the rest of my life, but also I would like a TV show at some point.
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Everyone's extremely and easily offended now.
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I don't get to the global issues or anything like that. I am just trying to be silly.
Brad Williams
