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Most of the times to be honest with you, I get sexually harassed certainly more than I do to females, because... they are comfortable with me, and because they know I can't take it to a dangerous place.

Brad Williams

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Brad Williams
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It takes a surprisingly large amount of intelligence to be a professional idiot.
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I just don't get if you have ever gotten offended by a joke, why would you go to a comedy club? That's where jokes happen.
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I don't get all the anger that is thrown at comedians.
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If I make a joke about black people or Asian people or whatever, and then an Asian comes up to me afterwards and says, That joke offended me, I'm still more or less not going to listen, but at least it makes sense, like I said something that was about them.
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I kind of want to know a little bit about everything.
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I don't know, why am I called the opposite of what I am? It's very confusing to me.
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When a soldier of the night's watch dies they say, And now his watch is over. That's what they say when a comedian dies. They go, And now his tour is done.
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I'm such a damn workaholic, that it's interesting to be like, Oh, what do I do for fun?
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I want to go to Australia so bad, do comedy there, and see the people there. It's a great country. I have friends that are Australian that have told me all about it. I want to do comedy there.
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I'm in awe of comics that do things that I can't do, or haven't tried doing yet.
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It's extremely important for people to be informed and to be educated and to know what's going in their community and in their country, but every now and then you just kind of want to turn the brain off for a little bit and just laugh and be silly.
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Every now and then we're going to fail.
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When you talk about modern comedy I think there's a big three right now, and that's Louis C.K., Bill Burr, and Jim Jefferies. I don't think anyone's doing it better than those three guys.
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People ask me a lot like, Hey, so when are you done with your tour? Like when I die. That's when I'm done with my tour.
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I'm not going to talk too much politics because I'm not smart enough to do that.
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I try not to be hateful.
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I don't get to the global issues or anything like that. I am just trying to be silly.
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I like to talk about very different topics. I like to jump around a lot because I don't want people to come see me and then for an hour I tell jokes about being a little person. I just don't want that to happen. I understand that it's part of me, that's the first thing that you notice and it's something that people are curious about.
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It's very confusing to me why people take comedians so seriously.
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I like to play video games, I like to keep up with sports, and I just like to spend time with people, because I'm on the road so much that when I'm home, I like to spend time with people that I don't normally get to see.
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