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I was a disabled child. So, people made fun of me, don't pretend like this never happens. But at the same time, I never cried about it. I never got sad about it.

Brad Williams

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More quotes by Brad Williams

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I like to play video games, I like to keep up with sports, and I just like to spend time with people, because I'm on the road so much that when I'm home, I like to spend time with people that I don't normally get to see.
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Yeah, people do need to realize that just because they've seen me perform for an hour does not mean that we are now close.
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There are plenty of wonderful, good fat people in the USA that have no problems being fat, who I have no problems with being fat.
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When a soldier of the night's watch dies they say, And now his watch is over. That's what they say when a comedian dies. They go, And now his tour is done.
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I want to go to Australia so bad, do comedy there, and see the people there. It's a great country. I have friends that are Australian that have told me all about it. I want to do comedy there.
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I'm such a damn workaholic, that it's interesting to be like, Oh, what do I do for fun?
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Every now and then we're going to fail.
Brad Williams
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People ask me a lot like, Hey, so when are you done with your tour? Like when I die. That's when I'm done with my tour.
Brad Williams
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Most of the times to be honest with you, I get sexually harassed certainly more than I do to females, because... they are comfortable with me, and because they know I can't take it to a dangerous place.
Brad Williams
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I'm funny because I'm funny. And there's more to offer.
Brad Williams
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It takes a surprisingly large amount of intelligence to be a professional idiot.
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I like to talk about very different topics. I like to jump around a lot because I don't want people to come see me and then for an hour I tell jokes about being a little person. I just don't want that to happen. I understand that it's part of me, that's the first thing that you notice and it's something that people are curious about.
Brad Williams
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I just don't get if you have ever gotten offended by a joke, why would you go to a comedy club? That's where jokes happen.
Brad Williams
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I'm in awe of comics that do things that I can't do, or haven't tried doing yet.
Brad Williams
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I would love, obviously, just to keep doing stand-up. That's the constant. That's the thing that I'm going to do for the rest of my life, but also I would like a TV show at some point.
Brad Williams
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I was always the funny guy. Everyone wants to hang out with the funny guy.
Brad Williams
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I'm not going to talk too much politics because I'm not smart enough to do that.
Brad Williams
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When you talk about modern comedy I think there's a big three right now, and that's Louis C.K., Bill Burr, and Jim Jefferies. I don't think anyone's doing it better than those three guys.
Brad Williams
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I don't know, why am I called the opposite of what I am? It's very confusing to me.
Brad Williams
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I'm in awe of comedians that do things that I can't do, whether it be a one-liner comic like Anthony Jeselnik, whether it be social issues commentary, whether it be - hell, Carrot Top. I can't be Carrot Top. I can't.
Brad Williams