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When you talk about modern comedy I think there's a big three right now, and that's Louis C.K., Bill Burr, and Jim Jefferies. I don't think anyone's doing it better than those three guys.

Brad Williams

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When a soldier of the night's watch dies they say, And now his watch is over. That's what they say when a comedian dies. They go, And now his tour is done.
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Yeah, people do need to realize that just because they've seen me perform for an hour does not mean that we are now close.
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Everyone's extremely and easily offended now.
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I like to talk about very different topics. I like to jump around a lot because I don't want people to come see me and then for an hour I tell jokes about being a little person. I just don't want that to happen. I understand that it's part of me, that's the first thing that you notice and it's something that people are curious about.
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I want to go to Australia so bad, do comedy there, and see the people there. It's a great country. I have friends that are Australian that have told me all about it. I want to do comedy there.
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I'm such a damn workaholic, that it's interesting to be like, Oh, what do I do for fun?
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I'm in awe of comedians that do things that I can't do, whether it be a one-liner comic like Anthony Jeselnik, whether it be social issues commentary, whether it be - hell, Carrot Top. I can't be Carrot Top. I can't.
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If I make a joke about black people or Asian people or whatever, and then an Asian comes up to me afterwards and says, That joke offended me, I'm still more or less not going to listen, but at least it makes sense, like I said something that was about them.
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I just don't get if you have ever gotten offended by a joke, why would you go to a comedy club? That's where jokes happen.
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There are plenty of wonderful, good fat people in the USA that have no problems being fat, who I have no problems with being fat.
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Most of the times to be honest with you, I get sexually harassed certainly more than I do to females, because... they are comfortable with me, and because they know I can't take it to a dangerous place.
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I'm in awe of comics that do things that I can't do, or haven't tried doing yet.
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I don't think I'm extremely intelligent by any means.
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It's extremely important for people to be informed and to be educated and to know what's going in their community and in their country, but every now and then you just kind of want to turn the brain off for a little bit and just laugh and be silly.
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I don't want to be mean. I try not to be.
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The vast majority of people that have gotten mad at me for a joke that I've made were people that were, A, never going to see me in the first place, or, B, were dragged to see me by somebody else.
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It's very confusing to me why people take comedians so seriously.
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Every now and then we're going to fail.
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I was a disabled child. So, people made fun of me, don't pretend like this never happens. But at the same time, I never cried about it. I never got sad about it.
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If you got a hit every third time that you went up to bat in the major leagues, you'd be the greatest hitter of all time. I think my average is a little better than that.
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