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In my first stand-up acts there wasn't material even. You know, I'd go on stage and cry and read a Dear John letter or gut fish on stage. I could be odd - and it's what interested me as a comedian.
Bobcat Goldthwait
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Bobcat Goldthwait
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: May 26
Actor
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Syracuse
New York
Bob Goldthwait
Robert Francis Goldthwait
Fishes
Interested
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Wasn
John
Stand
Letters
Odd
Stage
Material
Letter
Read
Cry
Guts
Firsts
Dear
Comedian
First
Fish
Even
Materials
More quotes by Bobcat Goldthwait
It's that weird need to make tragedy about us. When you look at 9/11, there's people who really died and family members who really suffered. And then I would be in Montana, and a guy would go, You know, I was close to Ground Zero. And it's like, What are you talking about? You're in Montana. Everybody had to make it about them.
Bobcat Goldthwait
In fact, with Michael Jackson, I think those mourning people... They aren't even waking Michael, they're waking the Michael Jackson of '84. They never were given a chance to give their respects to the death of the guy they loved back in '84.
Bobcat Goldthwait
That's human nature - we want to completely rewrite history so it can be comfortable. Without getting too profound, I'm pretty sure that's where the invention of the afterlife comes from. We don't really become worm food. We go to a magical place with bunnies and rainbows.
Bobcat Goldthwait
When I was a baby I had no teeth. I couldn't get a job and I couldn't eat meat.
Bobcat Goldthwait
I retired from acting the same time they stopped hiring me. But following my own thing of making these small indie movies has been the happiest I've ever been.
Bobcat Goldthwait
America’s one of the finest countries anyone ever stole.
Bobcat Goldthwait
Fame is like a big eraser. It's strange, now that I'm famous. In my parents' opinion, all the shitty things - all the wreckage of my past - is erased. Now it's like I was never the kid who got arrested. Now I'm a wonderful son.
Bobcat Goldthwait
Well, I'm an uncle now ... don't know if I'm a good one. My nephew asked me the difference between a hamster and a gerbil and I told him I thought there was more dark meat on a gerbil.
Bobcat Goldthwait
What's the difference between a Dice Clay concert and a Klan rally? Nothing. Trick question.
Bobcat Goldthwait
I'm against gun control. It's not that I like guns, it's just that allowing Americans to have guns will increase the chances that a bunch of rednecks will blow each other's heads off.
Bobcat Goldthwait
If you ever see me getting beaten by the police, put down the video camera and come help me.
Bobcat Goldthwait
Go on, try weasel, try squirrel it tastes like chicken, it tastes just like chicken! If it tastes just like chicken, why don't you gimme some damn chicken?
Bobcat Goldthwait
Kurt (Cobain) was a fan of my standup, which was pretty weird. I know when people hear that, it's kind of like finding out that Jimi Hendrix really liked Buddy Hackett, but he interviewed me at a college radio station before they broke and did Bleach. And then, like, about two years later, I was opening for Nirvana at these huge sports arenas.
Bobcat Goldthwait
I can't feel my face. I mean I can touch it. But I can't feel it inside.
Bobcat Goldthwait