Quote

I am stressed because once I am flattened out so thin to be able to slide under a doorway, I may never be able to ever be unflattened so I could be regular sized again.

Bob Saget

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Bob Saget
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: May 17
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
Robert Lane Saget
Thin
Regular
Flattened
May
Sized
Able
Doorway
Ever
Doorways
Never
Slide
Slides
Stressed

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A good way to keep your relationship together is not to scream in terror when you see your partner naked.
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I'd like a nice piece of salmon that's not too pink inside and yet isn't too dry or crisp either.
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I was on Entourage last week smoking a bong and making out with hookers and I did show them that before, cause it wasn't a hard 'r' cause a lot of people are watching that show that they know, not my little one - she's 12, but very sophisticated so it's an unusual case.
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Words matter. Especially if you're kicking someone's ass in words with friends.
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Full House was a show that was done for ten-year-olds. The critics hated it. They said terrible, terrible things about it. But it should have been reviewed by ten-year-olds. That's who it was made for. They loved it. And if they loved it, great. Why the hell does a fifty-year-old guy working at a big newspaper have to tell me I'm a piece of crap?
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It's a new day: Full of promise and love. The only thing that can take away that great feeling is - reading the news or speaking to people.
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I have three kids, the oldest is 18 and her friends are going to see it The Aristocrats because they told her they're going to see it, especially her guy friends.
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I'm doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts, it's fantastic and it makes me very happy. I'm dirty, but not like this I just do comedy that I find funny. I'm working on a new tv show for cable and it's not set up yet.
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My father once told me, and it's stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart it pushes you forward.
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Paul Riser tells it in an interesting way he dissects it and tells the structure, you know, 'you don't mention that part here.' But that's what's interesting about it and the people who are absent are interesting too.
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Concerned we're in a time where politicians can't even fake sincerity. Aren't they supposed to be good at that?
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Nobody can tell me what I can or can't do, except they can.
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When someone you love is hurting, if it was possible, you'd want to take their pain for them. But do I really want cramps and sore boobs?
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If someone sprays windex in your food it can give you diarrhea. But once you wipe it off your windows, you're fine.
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I'm fortunate to know a lot of incredibly talented people, and they all want to be a penguin.
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I don't like to drink alone 'cause there's nobody to fight with.
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Yet there are some people - Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever he's a really funny guy, but he would love talking about comedy. I'm doing it right now and you all seem bored.
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Apparently my street has a leaf blower gang who tag team all day, so the sounds of the leaf blower are forever blowing from dawn to dusk.
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I just did a play in New York which has been my best experience that Ive had for maybe ever. It was Paul Weitzs play called Privilege and I was in New York for three months.
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Valuable people are undervalued.
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