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My dad's like, If your mom and I are having sex and we videotape it and she falls out of bed funny, can I win ten-thousand dollars?

Bob Saget

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Bob Saget
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: May 17
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
Robert Lane Saget
Mom
Dollars
Sex
Thousand
Videotape
Winning
Falls
Funny
Bed
Fall
Ten
Like
Dad

More quotes by Bob Saget

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No one gets a free ride. Except maybe bus drivers.
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Concerned we're in a time where politicians can't even fake sincerity. Aren't they supposed to be good at that?
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I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn't get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn't join a biker club.
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One of the first things I said when I signed on for the show was No hugs! Full House was all based on hugs.
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It's so nice to share a day as beautiful as this one with hundreds of thousands of reckless drivers.
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I will always prefer a hardback book, but I'm drawn to digital because it's so easy to acquire them when I'm having a need-to-read moment.
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I think comedy is on an organic upsurge right now because when I started, it was 1978 at The Comedy Store and Letterman had just stopped emceeing his morning show.
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I was going to do a big radio show, and I said to my driver, 'Radio can wait, take me to the Full House house.' It literally was a drive-by. I photobombed the Full House house yesterday. I took like 20 pictures because I thought I didn't look good in any of these - you can't see the house! You gotta really show that that's the house!
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I'm fortunate to know a lot of incredibly talented people, and they all want to be a penguin.
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Full House was a show that was done for ten-year-olds. The critics hated it. They said terrible, terrible things about it. But it should have been reviewed by ten-year-olds. That's who it was made for. They loved it. And if they loved it, great. Why the hell does a fifty-year-old guy working at a big newspaper have to tell me I'm a piece of crap?
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I was on Entourage last week smoking a bong and making out with hookers and I did show them that before, cause it wasn't a hard 'r' cause a lot of people are watching that show that they know, not my little one - she's 12, but very sophisticated so it's an unusual case.
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I don't like to drink alone 'cause there's nobody to fight with.
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My favorite procrastination is to make the choice to have valuable times with human beings that I care about instead of holing myself up alone to get my work done.
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I don't censor myself, but I don't want to force my sick-skewed version of the world, either.
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I think when you dissect a joke too much, you have ruined whatever there is in comedy.
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The selfish and usually pointless approach is to try to get both done simultaneously - accomplish your work at hand while begging forgiveness of those close to you while you're basically working in front of them during what could've been specifically 'quality time.'
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If you go with Marshall McLuhan's theory that the medium is the message, as soon as you're hosting a blooper show, you're done.
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Yet there are some people - Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever he's a really funny guy, but he would love talking about comedy. I'm doing it right now and you all seem bored.
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And turkeys are a bird. A very nervous bird. You'd be nervous too if you knew that one day you'd get your head cut off and... filled with stuffing.
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Apparently my street has a leaf blower gang who tag team all day, so the sounds of the leaf blower are forever blowing from dawn to dusk.
Bob Saget