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Nobody can tell me what I can or can't do, except they can.

Bob Saget

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Bob Saget
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: May 17
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
Robert Lane Saget
Except
Nobody
Tell

More quotes by Bob Saget

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If someone sprays windex in your food it can give you diarrhea. But once you wipe it off your windows, you're fine.
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What I've learned about comedy people is that they're defined by the harshest level they've been to, their personal Auschwitz.
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Valuable people are undervalued.
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They say, Keep your enemies closer. But what if you live with them?
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Some dead people said smart stuff.
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I'm fortunate to know a lot of incredibly talented people, and they all want to be a penguin.
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All I've ever done is try to entertain my way through a life that often has a huge amount of heaviness in it.
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Ladies, apologies, but isn't 'vintage' just used stuff?
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I was in a supermarket and I saw Paul Newman's face on salad dressing and spaghetti sauce....I thought he was missing.
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Now people want what the movie was about, which is violent comedy. And that's really what The Aristocrats is based on - what will a family do out of desperation.
Bob Saget
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It's okay to get stoned, as long as its not by other people.
Bob Saget
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My dad told me if I was ever intimidated by anyone, just picture them with their clothes off. He said that's how he dealt with my mom.
Bob Saget
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I love watching people get hit in the crotch. But only if they get back up. If their teeth are bleeding, if they're really hurt, if an ambulance has to come, I'm not laughing.
Bob Saget
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I have no plan except to take care of the people I love.
Bob Saget
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Apparently my street has a leaf blower gang who tag team all day, so the sounds of the leaf blower are forever blowing from dawn to dusk.
Bob Saget
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I have three kids, the oldest is 18 and her friends are going to see it The Aristocrats because they told her they're going to see it, especially her guy friends.
Bob Saget
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I was on Entourage last week smoking a bong and making out with hookers and I did show them that before, cause it wasn't a hard 'r' cause a lot of people are watching that show that they know, not my little one - she's 12, but very sophisticated so it's an unusual case.
Bob Saget
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When someone you love is hurting, if it was possible, you'd want to take their pain for them. But do I really want cramps and sore boobs?
Bob Saget
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I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn't get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn't join a biker club.
Bob Saget
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It think acceptance levels sort of swings back and forth. Like in the 60's there was a lot more freedom with sex that doesn't exist today. Language has gotten pushed a bit farther and violence is way far out.
Bob Saget