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I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.

Bob Hope

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Bob Hope
Age: 100 †
Born: 1903
Born: May 29
Died: 2003
Died: July 27
Actor
Boxer
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Leslie Townes Hope
Leslie Hope
Lester Hope
Packy East
Many
Elected
Jokes
Getting
Political

More quotes by Bob Hope

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After the 1984 Summer Olympics, Reagan wanted to add the U.S. volleyball team to his Cabinet. He figured if they can't shove his programs down Congress' throat, nobody can.
Bob Hope
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Go figure a crazy, mixed-up country where ballet outsells boxing. I wouldn't be surprised if their wrestling was on the level.
Bob Hope
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You know you've reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up.
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Tokyo cab drivers are all ex-kamikaze pilots.
Bob Hope
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I love flying. I've been to almost as many places as my luggage.
Bob Hope
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If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.
Bob Hope
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All British castles and old country homes are supposed to be haunted. It's in the lease.
Bob Hope
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Bing Crosby and I play a lot of golf together and I have a small course at my place where we often play for side stakes. The only troulbe is that when I win, I always have to engage and attorney before I can draw the money.
Bob Hope
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Did you see where President Reagan finally got a hearing aid? People have been telling him to get one for years, but he couldn't hear them.
Bob Hope
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Kissing is like drinking tea with a tea strainer, you can never get enough.
Bob Hope
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Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It's going to get us out of the house after dark!
Bob Hope
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When you get over 95, every day is your day.
Bob Hope
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Ronald Reagan is not a typical politician because he doesn't know how to lie, cheat, and steal. He's always had an agent for that.
Bob Hope
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I ruined my hands in the ring. The referee kept stepping on them.
Bob Hope
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The stealth bomber is supposed to be a big deal. It flies in undetected, bombs, then flies away. Hell, I've been doing that all my life.
Bob Hope
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The Governor has no presidential aspirations. In fact he just made a tour of 43 states just to tell them he's not running for anything.
Bob Hope
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The big difference in those days was that in England the Government subsidized TV, in America we work on TV so we can subsidize the Government.
Bob Hope
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Democrats have an answer to the unemployment problem. They're all running for the Presidency.
Bob Hope
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Lots of travel, away from home.
Bob Hope
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I'll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105.
Bob Hope