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I can't understand what's holding up our missile program. It's the first time the government ever had trouble making the taxpayers' money go up in smoke.

Bob Hope

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Bob Hope
Age: 100 †
Born: 1903
Born: May 29
Died: 2003
Died: July 27
Actor
Boxer
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Leslie Townes Hope
Leslie Hope
Lester Hope
Packy East
Firsts
Smoke
First
Program
Time
Trouble
Making
Understand
Missile
Money
Missiles
Government
Taxpayers
Ever
Holding

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If they liked you, they didn't applaud -- they let you live.
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A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?
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I'll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105.
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We flew over to England by the same route Churchill took. It was easy. All we had to do was follow the cigar ashes.
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Did you see where President Reagan finally got a hearing aid? People have been telling him to get one for years, but he couldn't hear them.
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Bing Crosby and I play a lot of golf together and I have a small course at my place where we often play for side stakes. The only troulbe is that when I win, I always have to engage and attorney before I can draw the money.
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If you think golf is relaxing, you're not playing it right.
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I was called Rembrandt Hope in my boxing days, because I spent so much time on the canvas.
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I have too much money invested in sweaters.
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I've never wanted an Oscar, although they are reassuring to an actor who doesn't know how really great he is.
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The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
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I feel very humble, but I think I have the strength of character to fight it.
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It flies so high, I swear I heard the organs playing.
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As soon as the war ended, we located the one spot on earth that hadn't been touched by the war and blew it to hell.
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Jimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells 'Fore!' the guy he's hit is already in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.
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