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I like a President who tells jokes instead of appointing them.

Bob Hope

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Bob Hope
Age: 100 †
Born: 1903
Born: May 29
Died: 2003
Died: July 27
Actor
Boxer
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Leslie Townes Hope
Leslie Hope
Lester Hope
Packy East
Appointing
Tells
Jokes
Instead
President
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You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra, I come around to your house personally and wet your finger while you're turning the pages.
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President Eisenhower has given up golf for painting. It takes fewer strokes.
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I knew the President would run for reelection in 1984. Why not? Actors love sequels ... and returns.
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If they liked you, they didn't applaud -- they let you live.
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Go figure a crazy, mixed-up country where ballet outsells boxing. I wouldn't be surprised if their wrestling was on the level.
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My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty one.
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Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.
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Did you see where President Reagan finally got a hearing aid? People have been telling him to get one for years, but he couldn't hear them.
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A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
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Television is the box they buried entertainment in.
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Celebrities have a way of touching our lives. Perhaps we are influenced by their screen image, or perhaps by their acquired status. Here are some celebrity quotes about Christmas. You will find that just like everybody else, celebrities also enjoy the little pleasures of Christmas.
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You know, marriage is making a big comeback. I know personally that in Hollywood people are marrying people they never married before.
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Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It's going to get us out of the house after dark!
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Take nine strokes off your score. Skip the last hole.
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I can't understand what's holding up our missile program. It's the first time the government ever had trouble making the taxpayers' money go up in smoke.
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Be happy you guys. Be proud! You know what you are: you're God's frozen people.
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The workers love Khrushchev very much. He hasn't got an enemy in the entire country. Quite a few under it.
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Bing Crosby and I play a lot of golf together and I have a small course at my place where we often play for side stakes. The only troulbe is that when I win, I always have to engage and attorney before I can draw the money.
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You can calculate Zsa Zsa Gabor's age by the rings on her fingers.
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The place was so British, I wouldn't have been surprised if the mice wore monocles.
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