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I have the perfect simplified tax form for government. Why don't they just print our money with a return address on it?

Bob Hope

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Bob Hope
Age: 100 †
Born: 1903
Born: May 29
Died: 2003
Died: July 27
Actor
Boxer
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Leslie Townes Hope
Leslie Hope
Lester Hope
Packy East
Money
Simplified
Form
Address
Government
Addresses
Print
Taxes
Return
Politics
Perfect

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With today's movies, if we took out all the bad language, we'd go back to silent films.
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Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It's going to get us out of the house after dark!
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I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.
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I've been married fifty-five years and I've been home three weeks.
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YOU CAN ONLY DO ONE THING AT A TIME SO CONCENTRATE ON IT.
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He was bare chested and in good trim. I said that just looking at him I knew there would always be an England
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It sure has been a pleasure for us to broadcast for the sailors and soldiers besides, its part of the National Defence Program to prepare our boys for anything.
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Democrats have an answer to the unemployment problem. They're all running for the Presidency.
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Eisenhower admitted that the budget can't be balanced and McCarthy said the communists are taking over. You don't know what to worry about these days - whether the country will be overthrown or overdrawn.
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I'd give up golf if I didn't have so many sweaters.
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I once showed Pat Bradley my swing and said, 'What do I do next?' Pat replied, 'Wait till the pain dies down.'
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Everyone's nervous these days. Ronald McDonald has hired six bodyguards, and that's just to protect his buns.
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Be happy you guys. Be proud! You know what you are: you're God's frozen people.
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I like to come to Washington, D.C., at least once a year. Why should my tax money travel more than I do?
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As soon as the war ended, we located the one spot on earth that hadn't been touched by the war and blew it to hell.
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To give you an idea of how fast we travelled - we left with two rabbits and when we arrived we still had only two.
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Bing Crosby and I play a lot of golf together and I have a small course at my place where we often play for side stakes. The only troulbe is that when I win, I always have to engage and attorney before I can draw the money.
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You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.
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Sure Vietnam is a dirty war. I've never heard of a clean one.
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Out here in the Pacific, they have typhoons and hurricanes that blow over 200 miles an hour. We have tornadoes and hurricanes back home, but I don't worry about them. The mortgage on my house is so heavy that nothing could budge it.
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