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I would not have had anything to eat if it wasn't for the stuff the audience threw at me.

Bob Hope

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Bob Hope
Age: 100 †
Born: 1903
Born: May 29
Died: 2003
Died: July 27
Actor
Boxer
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Leslie Townes Hope
Leslie Hope
Lester Hope
Packy East
Threw
Wasn
Audience
Stuff
Anything
Would
Men

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I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six.
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Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It's going to get us out of the house after dark!
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The audience was swell. They were so polite they covered their mouths when they yawned.
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Democrats have an answer to the unemployment problem. They're all running for the Presidency.
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Foursomes have left the first tee there and have never been seen again. They just find their shoelaces and bags.
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My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty one.
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I've been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.
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America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan - Go for the Gold.
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I felt I wasn't getting anywhere in England.
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A few years ago he had a big heart transplant in Chicago, a five-hour operation. It took the doctors four hours to get him on the operating table.
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A very, very religious man. Every time I eat a peanut, I feel immortal.
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There are many talented English personalities, but unfortunately they were all in Hollywood.
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If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.
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You know what a fan letter is - it's just an inky raspberry.
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Go figure a crazy, mixed-up country where ballet outsells boxing. I wouldn't be surprised if their wrestling was on the level.
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I left England when I was four because I found out I could never be King.
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Don't people know that they don't have to heckle the president of the United States? That's what Congress is for.
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Laughter is therapy-an instant vacation.
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Chiropractic is a wonderful means of natural healing!
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Congress may be going home for the holidays soon. How can you beat a Christmas gift like that?
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