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Seventy years of ad-lib material, and I am speechless.

Bob Hope

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Bob Hope
Age: 100 †
Born: 1903
Born: May 29
Died: 2003
Died: July 27
Actor
Boxer
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Leslie Townes Hope
Leslie Hope
Lester Hope
Packy East
Material
Materials
Years
Speechless
Seventy
Seventies
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More quotes by Bob Hope

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It's very frustrating making a picture in Paris. We work hard all day at the studio to get a love scene just right. Then, on my way home, I see couples on every street corner doing it better.
Bob Hope
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My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty one.
Bob Hope
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Be happy you guys. Be proud! You know what you are: you're God's frozen people.
Bob Hope
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Bing Crosby and I weren't the types to go around kissing each other. We always had a light jab for each other. One of our stock lines used to be There's nothing I wouldn't do for Bing, and there's nothing he wouldn't do for me. And that's the way we go through life - doing nothing for each other!
Bob Hope
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We're on our way to the Persian Gulf. Wait! It's a mistake! I thought they said Persian Golf.
Bob Hope
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I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom.
Bob Hope
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If they liked you, they didn't applaud -- they let you live.
Bob Hope
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Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.
Bob Hope
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Louis B. Mayer came out west with $28.00, a box camera and an old lion. He built a monument to himself -- the Bank of America.
Bob Hope
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I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.
Bob Hope
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A few years ago he had a big heart transplant in Chicago, a five-hour operation. It took the doctors four hours to get him on the operating table.
Bob Hope
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I knew the President would run for reelection in 1984. Why not? Actors love sequels ... and returns.
Bob Hope
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I get upset over a bad shot just like anyone else. But it's silly to let the game get to you. When I miss a shot I just think what a beautiful day it is. And what pure fresh air I'm breathing. Then I take a deep breath. I have to do that. That's what gives me the strength to break the club.
Bob Hope
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I don't know what people have against government they haven't done anything.
Bob Hope
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Tokyo cab drivers are all ex-kamikaze pilots.
Bob Hope
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She spoke perfect English, which led to considerable trouble. She couldn't understand us at all.
Bob Hope
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A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
Bob Hope
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Golf is my real profession. Entertainment is just a sideline. I tell jokes to pay my greens fees.
Bob Hope
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You know what a fan letter is - it's just an inky raspberry.
Bob Hope
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Rock and roll is catching on all over . . . France . . . England . . . They even have it in Japan, only over there they call it judo.
Bob Hope