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Congress may be going home for the holidays soon. How can you beat a Christmas gift like that?

Bob Hope

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Bob Hope
Age: 100 †
Born: 1903
Born: May 29
Died: 2003
Died: July 27
Actor
Boxer
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Leslie Townes Hope
Leslie Hope
Lester Hope
Packy East
Congress
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More quotes by Bob Hope

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Tokyo cab drivers are all ex-kamikaze pilots.
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You know, marriage is making a big comeback. I know personally that in Hollywood people are marrying people they never married before.
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I would not have had anything to eat if it wasn't for the stuff the audience threw at me.
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You know what a fan letter is - it's just an inky raspberry.
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Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.
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I have the perfect simplified tax form for government. Why don't they just print our money with a return address on it?
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You know you've reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up.
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I'd give up golf if I didn't have so many sweaters.
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Go figure a crazy, mixed-up country where ballet outsells boxing. I wouldn't be surprised if their wrestling was on the level.
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A very, very religious man. Every time I eat a peanut, I feel immortal.
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I felt I wasn't getting anywhere in England.
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Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies
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Be happy you guys. Be proud! You know what you are: you're God's frozen people.
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I'll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105.
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I just hope I don't have to explain all the times I've used His name in vain when I get up there.
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Sure Vietnam is a dirty war. I've never heard of a clean one.
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I once showed Pat Bradley my swing and said, 'What do I do next?' Pat replied, 'Wait till the pain dies down.'
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As the colonel and I sat swapping stories in the plane, a jet aircraft buzzed past our window. I asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, Don't worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it's obsolete.
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The service at the Imperial (Tokyo) is the finest I've encountered anywhere. There was a button next to my bed marked ROOM SERVICE - and a maid to press it for me.
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I get upset over a bad shot just like anyone else. But it's silly to let the game get to you. When I miss a shot I just think what a beautiful day it is. And what pure fresh air I'm breathing. Then I take a deep breath. I have to do that. That's what gives me the strength to break the club.
Bob Hope