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I tell jokes to pay my green fees.

Bob Hope

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Bob Hope
Age: 100 †
Born: 1903
Born: May 29
Died: 2003
Died: July 27
Actor
Boxer
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Leslie Townes Hope
Leslie Hope
Lester Hope
Packy East
Tell
Fees
Golf
Jokes
Green
Pay

More quotes by Bob Hope

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Eisenhower admitted that the budget can't be balanced and McCarthy said the communists are taking over. You don't know what to worry about these days - whether the country will be overthrown or overdrawn.
Bob Hope
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The best thing about growing older is that it takes such a long time.
Bob Hope
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Rock and roll is catching on all over . . . France . . . England . . . They even have it in Japan, only over there they call it judo.
Bob Hope
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It gave dirty politics a bad name.
Bob Hope
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We have 51 golf courses in Palm Springs. He [President Ford] never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot.
Bob Hope
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Jimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells 'Fore!' the guy he's hit is already in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.
Bob Hope
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The stealth bomber is supposed to be a big deal. It flies in undetected, bombs, then flies away. Hell, I've been doing that all my life.
Bob Hope
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You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.
Bob Hope
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We flew over to England by the same route Churchill took. It was easy. All we had to do was follow the cigar ashes.
Bob Hope
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I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.
Bob Hope
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Democrats have an answer to the unemployment problem. They're all running for the Presidency.
Bob Hope
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He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.
Bob Hope
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The place was so British, I wouldn't have been surprised if the mice wore monocles.
Bob Hope
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Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?
Bob Hope
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A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
Bob Hope
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If he slices the budget like he slices a golf ball, the nation has nothing to worry about.
Bob Hope
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Chiropractic is a wonderful means of natural healing!
Bob Hope
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There's a very apt saying in show business: If you don't go over budget in Paris, you're either very rich or very sick.
Bob Hope
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Louis B. Mayer came out west with $28.00, a box camera and an old lion. He built a monument to himself -- the Bank of America.
Bob Hope
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If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.
Bob Hope