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I tell jokes to pay my green fees.

Bob Hope

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Bob Hope
Age: 100 †
Born: 1903
Born: May 29
Died: 2003
Died: July 27
Actor
Boxer
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Leslie Townes Hope
Leslie Hope
Lester Hope
Packy East
Fees
Golf
Jokes
Green
Pay
Tell

More quotes by Bob Hope

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Go figure a crazy, mixed-up country where ballet outsells boxing. I wouldn't be surprised if their wrestling was on the level.
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You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.
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I have too much money invested in sweaters.
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Our first stop was red square, the heart of Moscow - if Moscow has one.
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He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.
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I like a President who tells jokes instead of appointing them.
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The firm is really ahead of the times. It has a stock market ticker that prints its report on thin aspirins.
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There's a very apt saying in show business: If you don't go over budget in Paris, you're either very rich or very sick.
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Television. That's where movies go when they die.
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Rock and roll is catching on all over . . . France . . . England . . . They even have it in Japan, only over there they call it judo.
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YOU CAN ONLY DO ONE THING AT A TIME SO CONCENTRATE ON IT.
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I love flying. I've been to almost as many places as my luggage.
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I ruined my hands in the ring. The referee kept stepping on them.
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My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?
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I have the perfect simplified tax form for government. Why don't they just print our money with a return address on it?
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She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn't help wondering from what direction.
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Did you see where President Reagan finally got a hearing aid? People have been telling him to get one for years, but he couldn't hear them.
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Free speech isn't dead in Germany and Italy, merely the speakers.
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The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
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I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type.
Bob Hope