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Middle age is when you still believe you'll feel better in the morning.

Bob Hope

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Bob Hope
Age: 100 †
Born: 1903
Born: May 29
Died: 2003
Died: July 27
Actor
Boxer
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Leslie Townes Hope
Leslie Hope
Lester Hope
Packy East
Age
Stills
Still
Better
Feel
Birthday
Feels
Comedy
Believe
Middle
Morning

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Did you see where President Reagan finally got a hearing aid? People have been telling him to get one for years, but he couldn't hear them.
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As the colonel and I sat swapping stories in the plane, a jet aircraft buzzed past our window. I asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, Don't worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it's obsolete.
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Louis B. Mayer came out west with $28.00, a box camera and an old lion. He built a monument to himself -- the Bank of America.
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You know you've reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up.
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I once showed Pat Bradley my swing and said, 'What do I do next?' Pat replied, 'Wait till the pain dies down.'
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I can't understand what's holding up our missile program. It's the first time the government ever had trouble making the taxpayers' money go up in smoke.
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If you think golf is relaxing, you're not playing it right.
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Golf is my real profession. Entertainment is just a sideline. I tell jokes to pay my greens fees.
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I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type.
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Kissing is like drinking tea with a tea strainer, you can never get enough.
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She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn't help wondering from what direction.
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When you get over 95, every day is your day.
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Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies
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America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan - Go for the Gold.
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To give you an idea of how fast we travelled - we left with two rabbits and when we arrived we still had only two.
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Sure Vietnam is a dirty war. I've never heard of a clean one.
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I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.
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I'd give up golf if I didn't have so many sweaters.
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As soon as the war ended, we located the one spot on earth that hadn't been touched by the war and blew it to hell.
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The best thing about growing older is that it takes such a long time.
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