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When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot both his parents and moved in.

Bob Hope

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Bob Hope
Age: 100 †
Born: 1903
Born: May 29
Died: 2003
Died: July 27
Actor
Boxer
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Leslie Townes Hope
Leslie Hope
Lester Hope
Packy East
Actor
Parents
Benny
Comedy
Orphanage
Parent
Jack
Actors
Shot
Something
Shots
Moved
Asked

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The big difference in those days was that in England the Government subsidized TV, in America we work on TV so we can subsidize the Government.
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One of the greatest gifts to mankind is laughter, and one of the greatest gifts to laughter is Lucille Ball. God has her now but thanks to television, we'll have her forever.
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My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?
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If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.
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You know what a fan letter is - it's just an inky raspberry.
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Out here in the Pacific, they have typhoons and hurricanes that blow over 200 miles an hour. We have tornadoes and hurricanes back home, but I don't worry about them. The mortgage on my house is so heavy that nothing could budge it.
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As the colonel and I sat swapping stories in the plane, a jet aircraft buzzed past our window. I asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, Don't worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it's obsolete.
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I've never wanted an Oscar, although they are reassuring to an actor who doesn't know how really great he is.
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I don't know what people have against government they haven't done anything.
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Sure Vietnam is a dirty war. I've never heard of a clean one.
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I like to come to Washington, D.C., at least once a year. Why should my tax money travel more than I do?
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The audience was swell. They were so polite they covered their mouths when they yawned.
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You know you've reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up.
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Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies
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Free speech isn't dead in Germany and Italy, merely the speakers.
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I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.
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It was a great honour to be inducted into the Hall of Fame. I didn't know they had a caddie division.
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I've been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.
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