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Happy Thanksgiving! I broke into Best Buy and stole a copy of Pocahontas to celebrate.
Bo Burnham
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Bo Burnham
Age: 34
Born: 1990
Born: August 21
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Musician
Pianist
Poet
Rapper
Screenwriter
Singer-Songwriter
Television Actor
Hamilton
Massachusetts
Robert Pickering Bo Burnham
Robert Pickering Burnham
Thanksgiving
Copies
Celebrate
Broke
Happy
Best
Pocahontas
Stole
Copy
More quotes by Bo Burnham
I chose to do comedy instead of going to college.
Bo Burnham
The strange thing with Wikipedia is that the first article that ever gets written about you will define your Wikipedia page forever.
Bo Burnham
My first concern is that when you go to a show, you should be present. It's much more exciting to put the camera down and lose yourself in it.
Bo Burnham
I've found, across the board, that comedians have been very respectful and kind to me. And that seems to stem from the fact that they are just respectful and kind people in general. Comedians get a bad rap for being dark and anti-social I think.
Bo Burnham
I stopped and I thought, 'What would Jesus do?' So I didn't exist.
Bo Burnham
And if ten percent of men are gay and twenty percent of men are Chinese, what are the odds that a men chosen at random spends his free time and mealtime while on his knees.
Bo Burnham
Nothing's true that I say, because I don't really want to say anything. I don't think my life's that cool, and I don't think my opinion's that valid. They're just silly jokes. Usually I just take a topic that isn't funny at all, like Shakespeare, and work backwards. I just try to find an unfunny subject.
Bo Burnham
All you god damn dirty Catholics can cath-o-lick my balls.
Bo Burnham
I saw a giraffe with a short neck That was sad Or a deer
Bo Burnham
Squaring numbers are just like women. If they're under thirteen, just do them in your head.
Bo Burnham
Do you guys like impressions? Why? That was Socrates.
Bo Burnham
I actually wrestled in high school. I was only in one match, and I lost... my virginity.
Bo Burnham
I remember being superyoung, like nine or ten years old, and thinking, 'Man, I wonder what famous people eat for breakfast. They must have some special kind of cereal!' My mind was so warped by the idea of fame.
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I don't like calling myself a feminist only because I don't think I've done anything active enough to call myself one. It'd be like calling myself a civil rights activist just because I'm not racist.
Bo Burnham
Postmodern comedy doesn't work well with very old audiences, because it's making fun of the comedy they enjoy.
Bo Burnham
I believe, firmly, that women are always right. Ah, I should actually rephrase that: I... don't.
Bo Burnham
Quotes are for dumb people who can't think of something intelligent to say on their own.
Bo Burnham
For some comedians it feels so cool to be like: 'I'll say anything, man!'. I'm not quite there yet.
Bo Burnham
I'm interested in taboos for certain reasons. They can dramatise things and they're scary, and they're important to think about. I'm also wary about the fact that if you don't proceed with caution and understand what you're doing, you understand these things are realities that you're dealing with, they're real things.
Bo Burnham
Women are like fingers and toes because they're easy to count on.
Bo Burnham