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Squaring numbers are just like women. If they're under thirteen, just do them in your head.
Bo Burnham
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Bo Burnham
Age: 34
Born: 1990
Born: August 21
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Musician
Pianist
Poet
Rapper
Screenwriter
Singer-Songwriter
Television Actor
Hamilton
Massachusetts
Robert Pickering Bo Burnham
Robert Pickering Burnham
Numbers
Head
Women
Like
Squaring
Thirteen
More quotes by Bo Burnham
I chose to do comedy instead of going to college.
Bo Burnham
I think controversy has this allusion of being controversial but it's totally not, which is why I'm trying to get away from it because it's just easy and automatic.
Bo Burnham
I always wanted to be a comedian and actor. I basically stumbled into the music medium, though. I'm OK, but that's about it. I like to think I'm good enough not to negatively affect the performance.
Bo Burnham
Do you guys like impressions? Why? That was Socrates.
Bo Burnham
And two balls minus one, six titles at the tour de France.
Bo Burnham
I masturbate 'cause I'm the only one whose standards are low enough to f-k me.
Bo Burnham
In the distance, Bo saw a fairy. A fairy so beautiful that he felt proud of being called one in highschool.
Bo Burnham
I just try to do things on stage that I think the audience would enjoy. And I try to draw on and add to acts that I've enjoyed watching.
Bo Burnham
I've been doin' drive-bys all of my life. Except the bullets are newspapers, the car is my bike.
Bo Burnham
When I see someone filming me, I don't usually think, 'No, man, don't put this up online!' I'd think, 'Hey man, you don't get to go to shows very often, put down the camera and enjoy it!' I love going to theatre and to shows so much.
Bo Burnham
I remember being superyoung, like nine or ten years old, and thinking, 'Man, I wonder what famous people eat for breakfast. They must have some special kind of cereal!' My mind was so warped by the idea of fame.
Bo Burnham
I love you like a gay geneticist loves designer genes.
Bo Burnham
I've found nothing but support and generosity from older comics. I think comedians are a lot nicer than the stigma is, at least from my experience.
Bo Burnham
Postmodern comedy doesn't work well with very old audiences, because it's making fun of the comedy they enjoy.
Bo Burnham
When things [writing] are over, I always think, 'well, I'm never going to do anything again because I have no ideas so I'm going to go be a farmer'. Or else ideas will come and and if not then I become a farmer. Hopefully won't happen.
Bo Burnham
I get more ass than a giant donkey stable.
Bo Burnham
Laughter is the best medicine, y'know, besides medicine.
Bo Burnham
If Jesus can walk on water, can he swim on land?
Bo Burnham
If I had a dime for every time a homeless guy asked me for change, I'd still say no.
Bo Burnham
I know it's the comedian's instinct to say, Do it, man, nothing's off-limits! It's cool, bro! I don't know if that's the answer for me. Do I really want to make a joke about a miscarriage when a woman in the audience might have had one? I don't worship comedy at the end of the day I don't fall to the altar of comedy unquestioningly.
Bo Burnham