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I've been doin' drive-bys all of my life. Except the bullets are newspapers, the car is my bike.
Bo Burnham
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Bo Burnham
Age: 34
Born: 1990
Born: August 21
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Musician
Pianist
Poet
Rapper
Screenwriter
Singer-Songwriter
Television Actor
Hamilton
Massachusetts
Robert Pickering Bo Burnham
Robert Pickering Burnham
Bullets
Bike
Newspapers
Drive
Car
Except
Life
Doin
More quotes by Bo Burnham
Back home they call me the tie-dye shirt kid. Well, that and faggot.
Bo Burnham
I stopped and I thought, 'What would Jesus do?' So I didn't exist.
Bo Burnham
I'm friends with a lot of comedians, but we don't talk about material. Most comedians I know don't watch a lot of other comedy.
Bo Burnham
When things [writing] are over, I always think, 'well, I'm never going to do anything again because I have no ideas so I'm going to go be a farmer'. Or else ideas will come and and if not then I become a farmer. Hopefully won't happen.
Bo Burnham
I'd really love to make something that doesn't involve my stupid face.
Bo Burnham
I love you like a gay geneticist loves designer genes.
Bo Burnham
I actually wrestled in high school. I was only in one match, and I lost... my virginity.
Bo Burnham
When I see someone filming me, I don't usually think, 'No, man, don't put this up online!' I'd think, 'Hey man, you don't get to go to shows very often, put down the camera and enjoy it!' I love going to theatre and to shows so much.
Bo Burnham
I remember being superyoung, like nine or ten years old, and thinking, 'Man, I wonder what famous people eat for breakfast. They must have some special kind of cereal!' My mind was so warped by the idea of fame.
Bo Burnham
I worked eight hours a day just so I could get into the college of my dreams and say that I got in - and I never went.
Bo Burnham
When life gets you down, make a comforter!
Bo Burnham
I get more ass than a giant donkey stable.
Bo Burnham
I have a pretty good math mind, so I can see patterns, but I don't have a great ear. It's like a tragedy - I can see so much more natural musical ability in so many other people.
Bo Burnham
I'm interested in taboos for certain reasons. They can dramatise things and they're scary, and they're important to think about. I'm also wary about the fact that if you don't proceed with caution and understand what you're doing, you understand these things are realities that you're dealing with, they're real things.
Bo Burnham
I met a bipolar bear. He laughed, cried, then wanted a threesome.
Bo Burnham
I think the love-hate is fundamental. Everyone hates reality television, and everyone's watching it. Everyone hates Facebook, and everyone is on it.
Bo Burnham
Nothing's true that I say, because I don't really want to say anything. I don't think my life's that cool, and I don't think my opinion's that valid. They're just silly jokes. Usually I just take a topic that isn't funny at all, like Shakespeare, and work backwards. I just try to find an unfunny subject.
Bo Burnham
Women are like fingers and toes because they're easy to count on.
Bo Burnham
Humour is often linked to shared experience. Like, a guy gets up and says, Have you noticed public restrooms have really inefficient hand-dryers? Oh my God, yes I have, hahaha, really good point, they should... fix that. It's good to know that somebody finally gets me!
Bo Burnham
All you god damn dirty Catholics can cath-o-lick my balls.
Bo Burnham
