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The average person has one Fallopian tube.
Bo Burnham
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Bo Burnham
Age: 34
Born: 1990
Born: August 21
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Musician
Pianist
Poet
Rapper
Screenwriter
Singer-Songwriter
Television Actor
Hamilton
Massachusetts
Robert Pickering Bo Burnham
Robert Pickering Burnham
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More quotes by Bo Burnham
Quotes are for dumb people who can't think of something intelligent to say on their own.
Bo Burnham
I'd really love to make something that doesn't involve my stupid face.
Bo Burnham
The strange thing with Wikipedia is that the first article that ever gets written about you will define your Wikipedia page forever.
Bo Burnham
When I see someone filming me, I don't usually think, 'No, man, don't put this up online!' I'd think, 'Hey man, you don't get to go to shows very often, put down the camera and enjoy it!' I love going to theatre and to shows so much.
Bo Burnham
I've found, across the board, that comedians have been very respectful and kind to me. And that seems to stem from the fact that they are just respectful and kind people in general. Comedians get a bad rap for being dark and anti-social I think.
Bo Burnham
Nothing's true that I say, because I don't really want to say anything. I don't think my life's that cool, and I don't think my opinion's that valid. They're just silly jokes. Usually I just take a topic that isn't funny at all, like Shakespeare, and work backwards. I just try to find an unfunny subject.
Bo Burnham
I worked eight hours a day just so I could get into the college of my dreams and say that I got in - and I never went.
Bo Burnham
What's important is that you stay true to yourself. Because when you enter the real world, the most valuable thing you can bring is all your you-ness. The world doesn't need any more hot chicks or tough guys or smooth talkers - the world needs more you. And don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
Bo Burnham
I don't need anything as long as I have my family, friends, millions of dollars, unlimited pussy.
Bo Burnham
Squaring numbers are just like women. If they're under thirteen, just do them in your head.
Bo Burnham
Comedy should be a source of positivity. I don't want to bully people, and I don't want people to come to my show to feel terrible about something. I'm actually very open to having a conversation about what I should or shouldn't say.
Bo Burnham
Even if he is your friend, never, ever call an Asian person.
Bo Burnham
I saw a giraffe with a short neck That was sad Or a deer
Bo Burnham
Back home they call me the tie-dye shirt kid. Well, that and faggot.
Bo Burnham
Drugs kill, just like cancer. So don't smoke... tumors.
Bo Burnham
I believe, firmly, that women are always right. Ah, I should actually rephrase that: I... don't.
Bo Burnham
Laughter is the best medicine, y'know, besides medicine.
Bo Burnham
I'm friends with a lot of comedians, but we don't talk about material. Most comedians I know don't watch a lot of other comedy.
Bo Burnham
I misdirect the audience, so they have no idea where they are or who they're listening to.
Bo Burnham
I think controversy has this allusion of being controversial but it's totally not, which is why I'm trying to get away from it because it's just easy and automatic.
Bo Burnham
