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The average person has one Fallopian tube.

Bo Burnham

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Bo Burnham
Age: 34
Born: 1990
Born: August 21
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Musician
Pianist
Poet
Rapper
Screenwriter
Singer-Songwriter
Television Actor
Hamilton
Massachusetts
Robert Pickering Bo Burnham
Robert Pickering Burnham
Person
Tube
Tubes
Average
Persons

More quotes by Bo Burnham

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I've found nothing but support and generosity from older comics. I think comedians are a lot nicer than the stigma is, at least from my experience.
Bo Burnham
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I'm not a grown up until everybody realises I'm a grown up. When everyone remembers me as the dirty kid singing little songs I am the dirty little kid.
Bo Burnham
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When life gets you down, make a comforter!
Bo Burnham
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When I see someone filming me, I don't usually think, 'No, man, don't put this up online!' I'd think, 'Hey man, you don't get to go to shows very often, put down the camera and enjoy it!' I love going to theatre and to shows so much.
Bo Burnham
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I stopped and I thought, 'What would Jesus do?' So I didn't exist.
Bo Burnham
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I always wanted to be a comedian and actor. I basically stumbled into the music medium, though. I'm OK, but that's about it. I like to think I'm good enough not to negatively affect the performance.
Bo Burnham
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I think the love-hate is fundamental. Everyone hates reality television, and everyone's watching it. Everyone hates Facebook, and everyone is on it.
Bo Burnham
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I met a bipolar bear. He laughed, cried, then wanted a threesome.
Bo Burnham
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Humour is often linked to shared experience. Like, a guy gets up and says, Have you noticed public restrooms have really inefficient hand-dryers? Oh my God, yes I have, hahaha, really good point, they should... fix that. It's good to know that somebody finally gets me!
Bo Burnham
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Do you guys like impressions? Why? That was Socrates.
Bo Burnham
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Drugs kill, just like cancer. So don't smoke... tumors.
Bo Burnham
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Maybe life on earth could be heaven, doesn't just the thought of it make it worth a try?
Bo Burnham
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I don't want to try to recreate for no reason. Like, me in my bedroom, singing songs to a camera was a special thing that was at that time in my life. But I'm just not that kid. I like the format of it, but I want to be able to release things for free.
Bo Burnham
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All you god damn dirty Catholics can cath-o-lick my balls.
Bo Burnham
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People do complain about the way I act on stage... They think on stage I act too arrogant, too self-obsessed, solecistic, self-contained, synonyms.
Bo Burnham
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I actually wrestled in high school. I was only in one match, and I lost... my virginity.
Bo Burnham
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I get more ass than a giant donkey stable.
Bo Burnham
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I never said I was funny, OK, so stop staring at me.
Bo Burnham
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My work is trying to at least define myself on my own terms, and then if other people enjoy things that's a lovely addition.
Bo Burnham
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Happy Thanksgiving! I broke into Best Buy and stole a copy of Pocahontas to celebrate.
Bo Burnham