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If I had a dime for every time a homeless guy asked me for change, I'd still say no.
Bo Burnham
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Bo Burnham
Age: 34
Born: 1990
Born: August 21
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Musician
Pianist
Poet
Rapper
Screenwriter
Singer-Songwriter
Television Actor
Hamilton
Massachusetts
Robert Pickering Bo Burnham
Robert Pickering Burnham
Guy
Funny
Stills
Dime
Change
Dimes
Still
Homeless
Every
Asked
Time
Humor
Comedy
More quotes by Bo Burnham
Squaring numbers are just like women. If they're under thirteen, just do them in your head.
Bo Burnham
All you god damn dirty Catholics can cath-o-lick my balls.
Bo Burnham
I just try to do things on stage that I think the audience would enjoy. And I try to draw on and add to acts that I've enjoyed watching.
Bo Burnham
I love you like a gay geneticist loves designer genes.
Bo Burnham
Bitches and hoes don't exist because the hoes know Bo's a feminist.
Bo Burnham
I don't need anything as long as I have my family, friends, millions of dollars, unlimited pussy.
Bo Burnham
Postmodern comedy doesn't work well with very old audiences, because it's making fun of the comedy they enjoy.
Bo Burnham
Comedy is very strange to me and I don't fully understand it's purpose or function.
Bo Burnham
Women are like fingers and toes because they're easy to count on.
Bo Burnham
I chose to do comedy instead of going to college.
Bo Burnham
When life gets you down, make a comforter!
Bo Burnham
I stopped and I thought, 'What would Jesus do?' So I didn't exist.
Bo Burnham
I'd really love to make something that doesn't involve my stupid face.
Bo Burnham
When I tried to hit puberty I swung and I missed.
Bo Burnham
My work is trying to at least define myself on my own terms, and then if other people enjoy things that's a lovely addition.
Bo Burnham
I worked eight hours a day just so I could get into the college of my dreams and say that I got in - and I never went.
Bo Burnham
Humour is often linked to shared experience. Like, a guy gets up and says, Have you noticed public restrooms have really inefficient hand-dryers? Oh my God, yes I have, hahaha, really good point, they should... fix that. It's good to know that somebody finally gets me!
Bo Burnham
If comedy is about surprises, about tension, there's a lot of tension and surprise there, in the fact that people are expecting this to be natural.
Bo Burnham
Back home they call me the tie-dye shirt kid. Well, that and faggot.
Bo Burnham
I think controversy has this allusion of being controversial but it's totally not, which is why I'm trying to get away from it because it's just easy and automatic.
Bo Burnham
