Quote

,000 people in Hampden Park. Of course they're all Scottish. Because no one else goes there. The English have an unwritten rule: they only go to places they might get back from.

Billy Connolly

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Billy Connolly
Age: 81
Born: 1942
Born: November 24
Actor
Banjoist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Guitarist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Glasgow
Scotland
Sir William Connolly
Might
Rule
People
Places
Football
Unwritten
Goes
Scottish
Courses
Park
Course
Parks
Else
Soccer
Back
English

More quotes by Billy Connolly

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When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, Has the bus come yet?. If the bus came would I be standing here?
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Ally MacLeod thinks that tactics are a new kind of mint.
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If you're going to do an interview about a movie or anything like that, you're vulnerable. You say stupid things. Or if you're applying for a green card you feel very vulnerable and you're likely to spout out something stupid in the middle of it all.
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I started to draw desert islands. They were just rough, shapes in the middle of the page. Then I began drawing shapes within those shapes and I was amazed how quickly the islands got better. It took off from there.
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Outgrew the media... The negativity felt like a disease.
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If you don't know how to meditate at least try to spend some time every day just sitting.
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Avoid people who say they know the answer. Keep the company of people who are trying to understand the question.
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I don't like the beach. I think we have no business at the beach at all, as a species. We don't belong in the sea. The sea is full of things that bite us, sting us, hurt the soles of our feet, and it's extremely cold. When are we gonna take the hint that the things that live in the sea don't like us?
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In Mexico, everything on the menu is the same dish. The only difference is the way it's folded.
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When I was 12, we went from Glasgow to Aberdeen on a school trip. It was called fresh air fortnight.
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I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives.
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I've been very lucky because I've always had movies to do. So if I got bored between shows a movie would turn up.
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I spent the whole time battering people I liked and singing with my arm round people I loathed.
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Politically correct is the language of cowardice.
Billy Connolly
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And then there was my mate who'd just been fitted with a brand new hearing aid. It's the best in the world, he said. What type is it?, I asked and he said ten past twelve.
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I think of my life as a series of moments and I've found that the great moments often don't have too much to them. They're not huge, complicated events they're just magical wee moments when somebody says 'I love you' or 'You're a really good at what you do' or simply 'You're a good person'.
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I hate those earnest TV documentaries that are the world according to people with glasses who know better than you.
Billy Connolly
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Scottish-Americans tell you that if you want to identify tartans, it's easy - you simply look under the kilt, and if it's a quarter-pounder, you know it's a McDonald's.
Billy Connolly
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I've always been fascinated by the difference between the jokes you can tell your friends but you can't tell to an audience. There's a fine line you have to tread because you don't know who is out there in the auditorium. A lot of people are too easily offended.
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Scotland has the only football team in the world that does a lap of disgrace.
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