Quote

Why are there no windows in the toilets on aeroplanes? To protect you from the most dedicated perverts on the planet, hanging off the wing to get a peep?

Billy Connolly

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Billy Connolly
Age: 81
Born: 1942
Born: November 24
Actor
Banjoist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Guitarist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Glasgow
Scotland
Sir William Connolly
Dedicated
Perverts
Wings
Peep
Planet
Aeroplanes
Planets
Toilets
Window
Insightful
Travel
Windows
Protect
Wing
Funny
Hanging

More quotes by Billy Connolly

Image
I worry about ridiculous things, you know, how does a guy who drives a snowplough get to work in the morning. ... That can keep me awake for days.
Billy Connolly
Image
It seems to me that Islam and Christianity and Judaism all have the same god, and he's telling them all different things.
Billy Connolly
Image
On George W Bush: That man sits at that desk in the White House with the button that can end the world. My father's younger than him and we don't give him the controls for the television.
Billy Connolly
Image
Scotland has the only football team in the world that does a lap of disgrace.
Billy Connolly
Image
A lot of people are too easily offended. Religious people, for instance. They've been offending other people for centuries.
Billy Connolly
Image
There's no such thing as bad weather - only the wrong clothes.
Billy Connolly
Image
[To audience members who were arriving late] You haven't missed a thing, I was just killing time 'til you got here.
Billy Connolly
Image
I think my securities far outweigh my insecurities. I am not nearly as afraid of myself and my imagination as I used to be.
Billy Connolly
Image
I don't think I've ever died on stage. I've had jokes that died on stage. I've told a joke and absolutely nothing. They didn't know it was the end of the joke.
Billy Connolly
Image
I've been a poser for f--ing years. I say, pose your arse off. You know, have a laugh.
Billy Connolly
Image
Avoid people who say they know the answer. Keep the company of people who are trying to understand the question.
Billy Connolly
Image
I?m much bigger in Britain than I am there. I'm well-known, but my name's That Guy in America. . . . People shout: Hey ? I know you! You're That Guy..
Billy Connolly
Image
I love Scotland and I speak about it a lot, so people think I'm desperate to go back. They just take it upon themselves to say I'm going back, but I'm not. I'd rather concentrate on becoming a citizen of the world.
Billy Connolly
Image
A fart is just your arse applauding.
Billy Connolly
Image
Try to catch a trout and experience the glorious feeling of letting it go and seeing it swimming away.
Billy Connolly
Image
I've been very lucky because I've always had movies to do. So if I got bored between shows a movie would turn up.
Billy Connolly
Image
Learn to feel sorry for music because, although it is the international language, it has no swear words.
Billy Connolly
Image
Life is supposed to be fun. It's not a job or occupation. We're here only once and we should have a bit of a laugh.
Billy Connolly
Image
I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives.
Billy Connolly
Image
I like Salvador Dali and Rene Magritte. I also like the Scottish artist John Byrne, another surrealist.
Billy Connolly