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I think my securities far outweigh my insecurities. I am not nearly as afraid of myself and my imagination as I used to be.
Billy Connolly
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Billy Connolly
Age: 81
Born: 1942
Born: November 24
Actor
Banjoist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Guitarist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Glasgow
Scotland
Sir William Connolly
Thinking
Afraid
Humor
Security
Comedy
Outweigh
Imagination
Securities
Funny
Insecurities
Used
Insecurity
Think
Nearly
More quotes by Billy Connolly
Save the Trees? Trees are the main cause of Forest Fires!
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Life is supposed to be fun. It's not a job or occupation. We're here only once and we should have a bit of a laugh.
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Tread gently on anyone who looks at you sideways.
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If you haven't heard a good rumour by 11:00am, start one.
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I became a welder. I was actually becoming an Engineer and I joined the wrong queue. And so I became a welder, without knowing what a welder was.
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Scotland has the only football team in the world that does a lap of disgrace.
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Learn to feel sorry for music because, although it is the international language, it has no swear words.
Billy Connolly
I'd always been scared of people with tertiary education and high intellects in case they found me wanting. I thought they viewed me as just a welder who knew a few jokes.
Billy Connolly
Who discovered we could get milk from cows, and what did he think he was doing at the time?
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People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.
Billy Connolly
Why are there no windows in the toilets on aeroplanes? To protect you from the most dedicated perverts on the planet, hanging off the wing to get a peep?
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Revolution was written into the U.S. Constitution so it's like they're in a constant state of revolution. But then again, happiness is written into their constitution as well, which makes them pretty unique.
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It seems to me that Islam and Christianity and Judaism all have the same god, and he's telling them all different things.
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If you want to lose a bit of weight, don't eat anything out of a bucket.
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I set out to be a cross between Lenny Bruce and Robert the Bruce - my main thrust was the body and its functions and malfunctions - the absurdity of the thing.
Billy Connolly
I worry about ridiculous things, you know, how does a guy who drives a snowplough get to work in the morning. ... That can keep me awake for days.
Billy Connolly
The desire to be a politician should bar you for life from ever being one.
Billy Connolly
Don't buy one of those baby intercoms. Babies pretend to be dead. They're bastards, and they do it on purpose.
Billy Connolly
Killing a guy and stealing his wife and child isn't too nice a thing to do.
Billy Connolly
Politically correct is the language of cowardice.
Billy Connolly
