Quote

I don't believe in angels, no. But I do have a wee parking angel. It's on my dashboard and you wind it up. The wings flap and it's supposed to give you a parking space. It's worked so far.

Billy Connolly

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Billy Connolly
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: November 24
Actor
Banjoist
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Guitarist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Glasgow
Scotland
Sir William Connolly
Give
Angels
Giving
Wings
Believe
Angel
Supposed
Dashboard
Worked
Dashboards
Wind
Flap
Space
Parking
Religion
Marijuana

More quotes by Billy Connolly

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There's nothing like it, but it's not as good as you think it's going to be. . . . I was disappointed because there are records of people finding things that have been there for years. I was hoping for a shirt button, or my club's badge - but not a sausage.
Billy Connolly
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For me, it's about the desire to win. My audience becomes a crowd of wild animals and I have to be the lion-tamer or be eaten.
Billy Connolly
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When I was 12, we went from Glasgow to Aberdeen on a school trip. It was called fresh air fortnight.
Billy Connolly
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Learn to feel sorry for music because, although it is the international language, it has no swear words.
Billy Connolly
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Ally MacLeod thinks that tactics are a new kind of mint.
Billy Connolly
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A woman's mind is as complex as the contents of her handbag even when you get to the bottom of it, there is ALWAYS something at the bottom to surprise you!
Billy Connolly
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Why are there no windows in the toilets on aeroplanes? To protect you from the most dedicated perverts on the planet, hanging off the wing to get a peep?
Billy Connolly
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Where do you go when you die? The same place you were before you were born nowhere! It's over!
Billy Connolly
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I just believe in the movie. I don't care what the book was like. I don't care what the previous film was like or other films were like. I care only about the script I've got.
Billy Connolly
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Don't buy one of those baby intercoms. Babies pretend to be dead. They're bastards, and they do it on purpose.
Billy Connolly
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I think the longer Britain is in Europe the better.
Billy Connolly
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I'd always been scared of people with tertiary education and high intellects in case they found me wanting. I thought they viewed me as just a welder who knew a few jokes.
Billy Connolly
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In Mexico, everything on the menu is the same dish. The only difference is the way it's folded.
Billy Connolly
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I worry about ridiculous things, you know, how does a guy who drives a snowplough get to work in the morning. ... That can keep me awake for days.
Billy Connolly
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Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.
Billy Connolly
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I like Salvador Dali and Rene Magritte. I also like the Scottish artist John Byrne, another surrealist.
Billy Connolly
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Try to live in a place you like.
Billy Connolly
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My advice to you, if you want to lose a bit of weight: don't eat anything that comes in a bucket. Buckets are the kitchen utensils of the farmyard.
Billy Connolly
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Outgrew the media... The negativity felt like a disease.
Billy Connolly
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Now, the country is in a terrible state, and you've blamed it on a number of things: Unemployment rate, the value of the pound and all that... wrll, it's because the national anthem is boring.
Billy Connolly