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I think most of us would be horrified to meet ourselves and discover what everyone else already knows about us.
Bill Watterson
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Bill Watterson
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: July 5
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More quotes by Bill Watterson
Hee hee hee! You should've seen the look on your face! If mom and dad cared about me at all, they'd buy me some infra-red nighttime vision goggles.
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Reality continues to ruin my life.
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If you can't win by reason, go for volume.
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I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep everyone's expectations.
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Every artist learns through imitation, but I rather doubt the aim of these things is artistic development. I assume they're either homages or satiric riffs, and are not intended to be taken too seriously as works in their own right. Otherwise I should be talking to a copyright lawyer.
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Miss Wormwood: Calvin, your test was an absolute disgrace! It's obvious you haven't read any of the material. Our first president was not Chef Boy-Ar-Dee and you ought to be ashamed to have turned in such preposterous answers! Calvin: I just don't test well.
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I'm a 21st-century kid trapped in a 19th-century family.
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Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did? Calvin: No, but I can recite the secret superhero origin of each member of Captain Napalm's Thermonuclear League of Liberty. Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
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I think we dream so we don't have to be apart so long. If we're in each other's dreams, we can play together all night.
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Oh look, yet another Christmas TV special! How touching to have the meaning of Christmas brought to us by cola, fast food, and beer... Who'd have ever guessed that product consumption, popular entertainment, and spirituality would mix so harmoniously?
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Animation, by necessity, is a team sport, and the fewer people with input into my work, the better I like it.
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CALVIN: Our hero regains consciousness at the feet of a sarcastic alien.
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It's only work if somebody makes you do it.
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It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw.
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People always make the mistake of thinking art is created for them. But really, art is a private language for sophisticates to congratulate themselves on their superiority to the rest of the world. As my artist’s statement explains, my work is utterly incomprehensible and is therefore full of deep significance.
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The writing doesn't distract me while I'm drawing and vice versa. I can devote my full attention to each.
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CALVIN: When I grow up I want to be an inventor. First I will invent a time machine. Then I'll come back to yesterday and take myself to tomorrow and skip this dumb assignment.
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I'd hate to have a kid like me.
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It's a cruel season that makes you get ready for bed while it's light out.
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A REAL job is a job you hate.
Bill Watterson