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There is not enough time to do all the nothing we want to do.

Bill Watterson

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Bill Watterson
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: July 5
Author
Cartoonist
Comics Artist
Washington
District of Columbia
Nothing
Enough
Time
Clever
Smart
Funny

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Isn't it sad how some people's grip on their lives is so precarious that they'll embrace any preposterous delusion rather than face an occasional bleak truth?
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Calvin the zombie searches for food. Horribly, the undead feed upon the living! ...Although, in a pinch, a PBJ will do, if you eat it messily enough.
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I like my smock. You can tell the quality of the artist by the quality of his smock. Actually, I just like to say smock. Smock smock smock smock smock smock.
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I like these cold, gray winter days. Days like these let you savor a bad mood.
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I go to school, but I never learn what I want to know.
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I'm learning skills I will use for the rest of my life by doing homework...procrastinating and negotiation.
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I'm a 21st-century kid trapped in a 19th-century family.
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If you can't win by reason, go for volume.
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You will do well to cultivate the resources in yourself that bring you happiness outside of success or failure.
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I wish I had more friends, but people are such jerks. If you can just get most people to leave you alone, you're doing good. If you can find even one person you really like, you're lucky. And if that person can also stand you, you're really lucky.
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You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D's in school. Well guess what, I get F's!!!
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That's the difference between me and the rest of the world. Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
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We all have different desires and needs, but if we don't discover what we want from ourselves and what we stand for, we will live passively and unfulfilled.
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Even if lives did hang in the balance, it would depend on whose they were.
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Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said 'I think I’ll drink whatever comes out of these when I squeeze ’em?
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I'm willing to take the blame if the strip goes down the drain, and I want the credit if it succeeds. So long as it has my name on it, I want it to be mine.
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The real fun of living wisely is that you get to be smug about it.
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Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.
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I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?
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My guess is that the editor [Cincinnati Post] wanted his own Jeff MacNelly (a Pulitzer winner at 24), and I didn't live up to his expectations. My Cincinnati days were pretty Kafkaesque.
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