Quote

I'll bet my autopsy reveals my mouth is too big.

Bill Watterson

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Bill Watterson
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: July 5
Author
Cartoonist
Comics Artist
Washington
District of Columbia
Autopsy
Reveals
Mouth
Mouths
Bigs

More quotes by Bill Watterson

Image
We all have different desires and needs, but if we don't discover what we want from ourselves and what we stand for, we will live passively and unfulfilled.
Bill Watterson
Image
The real fun of living wisely is that you get to be smug about it.
Bill Watterson
Image
Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement.
Bill Watterson
Image
You will do well to cultivate the resources in yourself that bring you happiness outside of success or failure.
Bill Watterson
Image
Calvin: Trick or treat! Adult: Where's your costume? What are you supposed to be? Calvin: I'm yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you're old and weak... Am I scary, or what?
Bill Watterson
Image
I liked things better when I didn't understand them.
Bill Watterson
Image
The secret to enjoying your job is to have a hobby that's even worse
Bill Watterson
Image
CALVIN: When I grow up I want to be an inventor. First I will invent a time machine. Then I'll come back to yesterday and take myself to tomorrow and skip this dumb assignment.
Bill Watterson
Image
What assurance do I have that your parenting isn't screwing me up?
Bill Watterson
Image
Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did? Calvin: No, but I can recite the secret superhero origin of each member of Captain Napalm's Thermonuclear League of Liberty. Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
Bill Watterson
Image
Like delicate lace, so the threads intertwine, oh, gossamer web of wond'rous design! Such beauty and grace wild nature produces... Ughh, look at that spider suck out that bug's juices!
Bill Watterson
Image
It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.
Bill Watterson
Image
Years from now, when I'm successful and happy, ...and he's in prison... I hope I'm not too mature to gloat.
Bill Watterson
Image
Heck, what's a little extortion among friends?
Bill Watterson
Image
It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw.
Bill Watterson
Image
Look! A trickle of water running through some dirt! I'd say our afternoon just got booked solid!
Bill Watterson
Image
I suppose if we couldn't laugh at things that don't make sense, we couldn't react to a lot of life.
Bill Watterson
Image
So long, Pop! I'm off to check my tiger trap!
Bill Watterson
Image
Some people are pragmatists, taking things as they come and making the best of the choices available. Some people are idealists, standing for principle and refusing to compromise. And some people just act on any whim that enters their heads. I pragmatically turn my whims into principles.
Bill Watterson
Image
My likely historical significance is a terrible burden. ~ Calvin
Bill Watterson