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I'd hate to have a kid like me.
Bill Watterson
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Bill Watterson
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: July 5
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Cartoonist
Comics Artist
Washington
District of Columbia
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More quotes by Bill Watterson
I liked things better when I didn't understand them.
Bill Watterson
Like delicate lace, so the threads intertwine, oh, gossamer web of wond'rous design! Such beauty and grace wild nature produces... Ughh, look at that spider suck out that bug's juices!
Bill Watterson
You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D's in school. Well guess what, I get F's!!!
Bill Watterson
Of course, REAL zombies never get the giggles when they look at each other.
Bill Watterson
What state do you live in? Denial.
Bill Watterson
I wish people were more like animals. Animals don't try to change you or make you fit in. They just enjoy the pleasure of your company. Animals aren't conditional about friendships. Animals like you just the way you are. They listen to your problems, they comfort you when you're sad, and all they ask in return is a little kindness.
Bill Watterson
I like these cold, gray winter days. Days like these let you savor a bad mood.
Bill Watterson
My whole problem is that my lips move when I think.
Bill Watterson
They can't chain my spirit! My spirit runs free! Walls can't contain it! Laws can't restrain it! Authority has no power over it!
Bill Watterson
Calvin: Trick or treat! Adult: Where's your costume? What are you supposed to be? Calvin: I'm yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you're old and weak... Am I scary, or what?
Bill Watterson
Calvin: Dad where do babies come from? Dad: Well Calvin, you simply go to Sears, buy the kit and follow the assembly instructions. Calvin: I came from Sears? Dad: No you were a blue-light special at K-Mart - almost as good and a lot cheaper!
Bill Watterson
It's a cruel season that makes you get ready for bed while it's light out.
Bill Watterson
Calvin: They say the world is a stage. But obviously the play is unrehearsed and everybody is ad-libbing his lines. Hobbes: Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce. Calvin: We need more special effects and dance numbers.
Bill Watterson
Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said 'I think I’ll drink whatever comes out of these when I squeeze ’em?
Bill Watterson
Never argue with a six-year-old who shaves.
Bill Watterson
In a comic strip, you can suggest motion and time, but it's very crude compared to what an animator can do. I have a real awe for good animation.
Bill Watterson
Calvin: The more you know, the harder it is to take decisive action. Once you are informed, you start seeing complexities and shades of gray. You realize nothing is as clear as it first appears. Ultimately, knowledge is paralyzing. Being a man of action, I cannot afford to take that risk. Hobbes: You're ignorant, but at least you act on it.
Bill Watterson
I wish I had more friends, but people are such jerks. If you can just get most people to leave you alone, you're doing good. If you can find even one person you really like, you're lucky. And if that person can also stand you, you're really lucky.
Bill Watterson
The writing doesn't distract me while I'm drawing and vice versa. I can devote my full attention to each.
Bill Watterson
Heck, what's a little extortion among friends?
Bill Watterson