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I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.

Bill Watterson

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Bill Watterson
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: July 5
Author
Cartoonist
Comics Artist
Washington
District of Columbia
Thoroughly
Dumb
Useless
Command
Stupid
Information
Wormwood
Hobbes
Relatable

More quotes by Bill Watterson

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You are demoted from First Tiger to bulk rate.
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I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?
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Girls are like slugs - they probably serve some purpose, but it's hard to imagine what.
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I like maxims that don't encourage behavior modification.
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What I try to do in writing any character is to put myself in his position.
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I'm willing to take the blame if the strip goes down the drain, and I want the credit if it succeeds. So long as it has my name on it, I want it to be mine.
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I don't enjoy lettering very much, but that's the way I write and that belongs in the strip because the strip is a reflection of me.
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The strips I admire go farther than a gag a day, and take us into a special world.
Bill Watterson
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Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said 'I think I’ll drink whatever comes out of these when I squeeze ’em?
Bill Watterson
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I'm a man of few words. If you read more, you might have a larger vocabulary.
Bill Watterson
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For your information, I'm staying like this, and everyone else can just get used to it! If people don't like me the way I am, well TOUGH BEANS! It's a free country! I don't need anyone's permission to be the way I want! This is who I am - Take it or leave it!
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I think nighttime is dark so you can imagine your fears with less distraction.
Bill Watterson
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No sport is less organized than Calvinball.
Bill Watterson
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I think comics overall would be better. I think there's a tremendous potential to be tapped.
Bill Watterson
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Every artist learns through imitation, but I rather doubt the aim of these things is artistic development. I assume they're either homages or satiric riffs, and are not intended to be taken too seriously as works in their own right. Otherwise I should be talking to a copyright lawyer.
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Sleepwalking? Nightmare? Homicidal psycho jungle cat!
Bill Watterson
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S...For Stupendous! T...For Tiger, ferocity of! U...For Underwear, Red! P...For Power, Incredible! E...For excellent physique! N...For...Um...Something..Hm, well, I'll come back to that... D...For Determination! U...For...Wait, How do you spell this? Is it I??
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I still read newspaper comics, but without much hope for their future.
Bill Watterson
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Everybody I know fails the acid test of friendship.
Bill Watterson
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Well, remember what you said, because in a day or two, I'll have a witty and blistering retort! You'll be devastated THEN
Bill Watterson