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I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.

Bill Watterson

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Bill Watterson
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: July 5
Author
Cartoonist
Comics Artist
Washington
District of Columbia
Information
Wormwood
Hobbes
Relatable
Thoroughly
Dumb
Useless
Command
Stupid

More quotes by Bill Watterson

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Until you stalk and overrun, you cannot devour anyone. -Hobbes
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Garry Trudeau is the only cartoonist with the clout to get his strip published large enough to accomodate extended dialogue. It's ashame.
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Life is full of surprises, but never when you need one.
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Things are never quite as scary when you've got a best friend.
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Calvin the zombie searches for food. Horribly, the undead feed upon the living! ...Although, in a pinch, a PBJ will do, if you eat it messily enough.
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The only permanent rule in Calvinball is that you can never play it the same way twice! (Calvin)
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If you've ever compared a film to a novel it's based on, you know the novel gets bludgeoned. It's inevitable, because different media have different strengths and needs, and when you make a movie, the movie's needs get served.
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I wasn't having any luck getting accepted anyway and it forced me to re-examine what it was that I really wanted to do. In my experience in political cartooning, I was never one of those people who read the headlines and foams at the mouth with rabid opinion that I've just got to get down on paper.
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Know what's weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything's different.
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But Calvin is no kind and loving god! He's one of the old gods! He demands sacrifice!
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Even if lives did hang in the balance, it would depend on whose they were.
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Often it takes some calamity to make us live in the present. Then suddenly we wake up and see all the mistakes we have made.
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It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.
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I'm a man of few words. If you read more, you might have a larger vocabulary.
Bill Watterson
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Hobbes: What are you doing? Calvin: Being cool. Hobbes: You look more like you're being bored. Calvin: The world bores you when you're cool. Hobbes: Look, I brought a sombrero! Now we can both be cool. Calvin: A sombrero?! Are you crazy?! Cool people don't wear sombreros! Hobbes: What fun is it being cool if you can't wear a sombrero?
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As far as I'm concerned, if something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway.
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A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless interaction to a battle of wills and add drama to an otherwise dull day.
Bill Watterson
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If good things lasted forever, would we appreciate how precious they are?
Bill Watterson
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Calvin is hammering nails into coffee table. Mom: CALVIN WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO THE COFFEE TABLE?!? Calvin: Is this some sort of trick question, or what?
Bill Watterson
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You know, maybe we don't need enemies. Yeah, best friends aree about all I can take.
Bill Watterson