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I was out at the HBO party, these are liberals, I imagine, and a lot of people came up to me and said, Keep giving it to the president.

Bill Maher

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Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
President
Keep
Giving
People
Hbo
Liberals
Imagine
Came
Party

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I wouldn't touch a hot dog unless you put a condom on it! You realize that the job of a hot dog is to use parts of the animal that the Chinese can't figure out how to make into a belt?
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To those people who say, 'My father is alive because of animal experimentation,' I say, 'Yeah, well, good for you. This dog died so your father could live.' Sorry, but I am just not behind that kind of trade-off.
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Faith means making a virtue out of not thinking. It's nothing to brag about.
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You'd know if I was the de-facto leader of the Democratic Party, because you'd go down to Walgreen's and buy a pack of blunts.
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During the Depression, or back when we were fighting Hitler, people didn't have time to sue a company if the coffee was too hot. There were urgent, pressing problems. If you think you have it tough, read history books.
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That's ended, that's over. I want you to meet my pimps. I thought, I'm a show-business ho already, so I might as well be a real ho.
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In ancient times they sacrificed the virgins. Men were not about to sacrifice the sluts!
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I think the news people no longer have any idea of what covering the news is.
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Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic.
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What does it take for Republicans to take off the flag pin and say, 'I am just too embarrassed to be on this team'?
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You know, if you're an American and you're born at this time in history especially, you're lucky. We all are. We won the world history Powerball lottery...
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The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he's the only one in the world who treats me like I'm the Beatles.
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The difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull: At some point, a pit bull does stop whining.
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The jury could get the case as early as next week, but the defense says they just want to introduce one last-minute load of crap.
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Failing to warn the citizens of a looming weapon of mass destruction- and that's what global warming is- in order to protect oil company profits, well, that fits for me the definition of treason.
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The unemployment rate is now at 9.2%, which is scary, because experts say 9.5 is the point at which people are desperate enough to consider Michele Bachmann.
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If you ignore every single thing Jesus told you to do, you are just auditing. You're not a Christian.
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We've created over 200,000 jobs every month this year. Hasn't happened in 17 years. I guess my first question is, when do the Republicans stop calling it 'Obama's economy'?
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Ted Cruz, of course, was furious that the big storm back east shut down the government. He said, 'That my job!' But you know, there is a big difference between Ted Cruz and snow. Both are white and everyone’s sick of them – but eventually snow goes away.
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It somehow became an article of faith on the right that Obama is the most extreme president in American history. Although, when they say that, I think what they really mean is...he's black.
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