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When I was 5-years-old, I knew who Khrushchev was.

Bill Maher

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Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
Khrushchev
Knew
Years

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I want to see riots! I want to see the kind of riots where cab drivers are afraid to pick up white people! I want to see this guy!
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This is my question for conservatives: don't you want to live, too?
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Based on every statement I’ve heard out of any Republican in the last two years, the Israelis are controlling our government.
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Ronald Reagan basically legalized every illegal immigrant in this country. I just like to bring this up because every week I like to make Republican heads explode about how they love Ronald Reagan, but would despise everything he did.
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The jury could get the case as early as next week, but the defense says they just want to introduce one last-minute load of crap.
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Little do women know what big ideas I have in my pants.
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Suicide is man's way of telling God, 'You can't fire me - I quit.'
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Why is Mitt Romney not bragging: 'I covered all these people'? Why can't the Democrats sell the idea, we're trying to make you well? Is that such a hard sale?
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New Rule: The people of America who were most in favor of the Iraq War must now go there and fight it.
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They told us to buy duct tape and portable radios so that if the world does end, we can all listen to Rush Limbaugh blame it on Clinton.
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Mitt Romney we think is going run again. He says he has no plans to run, but he said if he did run, this time things would turn out differently. Yes they would. This time he would get his ass kicked by a woman.
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Disneyland's a mess. And it's not just the measles. Donald Duck has bird flu. Pocahontas has small pox. The Little Mermaid has crabs. And the Monorail? Mono.
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Death is the monster we all fear, yet with each day, we walk toward it, and can't help doing so we can't help but walk toward the one thing we're most trying to avoid.
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Romney, Gingrich, Santorum spent their week lecturing America about the morality of birth control. You know, you guys don't need birth control, you are birth control.
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