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My father said, Bring along your best girl. This is something you say to a pimp!
Bill Maher
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Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
Pimp
Along
Bring
Girl
Father
Best
Something
More quotes by Bill Maher
Tea Party has now cost the Republicans 5 senate seats. My next donation is going to them.
Bill Maher
To even win a nomination in this country, you have to say you're a person of great faith. You have to pledge to the people out there that you put your faith in things that are unable to be proven - that you suspend critical thinking as the way to go.
Bill Maher
Did you see Britney Spears at the Video Music Awards? I don't want to say that that performance was a disaster, but after the show, I saw Rudy Giuliani having his picture taken standing on her.
Bill Maher
I never hear terrorists say 'Merry Christmas,' only 'Allahu Akbar'.
Bill Maher
Wichita Falls, Texas is considering using toilet water for drinking. And a dog there today said, 'White people's problems.'
Bill Maher
I'd just like to know what a cop WOULD have to do to get indicted - and what good are cop cameras since Eric Garner IS on tape?
Bill Maher
If you think Democrats are going to take away your Bible, you're an idiot. If you think they are going to take away your gun, you're an armed idiot. If you think they're going to take away your gun and give it to a Mexican to kill your God, you're Bill O'Reilly.
Bill Maher
Stand-up is great because I can get everything off my chest.
Bill Maher
I understand we're on our way to being a Third World country. Could we just stop at 'Second World' before we get there?
Bill Maher
If anti-gay stuff is always coming out of your mouth, something very gay is probably going in.
Bill Maher
Space tourism is God's way of telling you you aren't spending enough on lap dances, baccarat and cocaine.
Bill Maher
I would describe my spirituality as exactly the opposite of having a religious affiliation.
Bill Maher
It's going to be Perry, it's going to be Romney...It's sort of a battle for the soul of the Republican Party - and they have no soul, but the space where a soul would be.
Bill Maher
I don't know anyone less Jesus like than Christians.
Bill Maher
I'll clue you in on a secret: death is not the worst thing that could happen to you. I know we think that we are the first society ever to think that. It's not worse than dishonor it's not worse than losing your freedom its not worse than losing a sense of personal responsibility.
Bill Maher
I was out at the HBO party, these are liberals, I imagine, and a lot of people came up to me and said, Keep giving it to the president.
Bill Maher
I have two questions about Arnold Schwarzenegger. What does he know, and when will he know it?
Bill Maher
A group of Cuban Americans denounced the Castro government as a fascist regime that monitors and scrutinized its citizens' everyday existence. And then they excused themselves to go watch Big Brother.
Bill Maher
There's a phrase we live by in America: In God We Trust. It's right there where Jesus would want it: on our money.
Bill Maher
I'm guessing our soldiers are happy to be leaving Iraq. It is no fun being in a country where there's crumbling infrastructure and an ignorant population, but they said they're happy to come home anyway.
Bill Maher
