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New Rule: The people of America who were most in favor of the Iraq War must now go there and fight it.
Bill Maher
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Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
Fighting
War
America
Must
Favor
People
Favors
Iraq
Rule
Fight
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The Tea Baggers, they're not a movement, they're a cult.... Cults tend to populate from within, encouraging members to have huge broods of children and to give them strange names, like Moonbeam, and Trig.
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I want to see riots! I want to see the kind of riots where cab drivers are afraid to pick up white people! I want to see this guy!
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They say that Japan's rigorous building codes and regulations saved thousands of lives over there. Or, as Republicans here saw it, it 'fostered a socialist, anti-business environment that's worse than being dead.'
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Last week, I suggested the candidates take up mushrooms. I'll be damned if Rick Perry didn't take me up on that.
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Stand-up is great because I can get everything off my chest.
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Officials believe that one of the terrorists was a woman. And there are female suicide bombers. It's just that their reward in paradise is a little different. Instead of getting 72 virgins, they get 72 guys who just listen.
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I'm okay with it now that Obama’s in office. I'm kind of trusting of him. But President Ted Cruz? Where this is going would bother me.
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Do you think if it was the fairy tale about a man who lived inside of a whale and it was religion that Jack built a beanstalk today, you would know the difference? Why do you believe in one fairy tale and not the other? Just because adults told you it was true and they scared you into believing it, at pain of death, at pain of burning in hell.
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If you ignore every single thing Jesus told you to do, you are just auditing. You're not a Christian.
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Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.
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It's all been satirized for your protection.
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A flu shot just compromises your immune system.
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Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.
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George Bush says, 'Gore's book needs a lot of explaining.' Of course, Bush says that about every book.
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I never, ever in my life tried to be outrageous. I've only ever tried to say what was truly on my mind and not pull punches about it.
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The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them.
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France... What can you say about a country that was too stupid to get on board with our wonderfully-conceived and brilliantly-executed war in Iraq?
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Maybe a president who didn't believe our soldiers were going to heaven might be a little less willing to get them killed.
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