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I understand we're on our way to being a Third World country. Could we just stop at 'Second World' before we get there?

Bill Maher

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Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
Stop
Understand
Country
Way
World
Third
Thirds
Second

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Hollywood isn't your cesspool, America. It's your mirror.
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Gordon Gekko was right: greed is good. Because, the potty-trained Republicans have now stepped forward - like the Koch brothers - to say, 'You know what? You yokels stop talking about defaulting on the debt, because I'm going to lose a fortune!'
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When I see the toothless guy, as a liberal, what I say is, 'I want to help you get teeth.' Why does that make me an a**hole?
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A flu shot is the worst thing you can do.
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During the debate, Bush was asked by a lady to name three mistakes he's made. And Bush responded, this debate, the last debate and the next debate.
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London. Another terrorist attack and ISIS claimed credit. I am surprised because I thought we had wiped out ISIS on day one as Donald Trump said.
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Trump is a little tone-deaf to the average American. He unveiled his slogan this week: 'Are you better off than you were four wives ago?'
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When we make mistakes they call it evil
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Ronald Reagan came from show business. His idea of how the government should help the homeless was like your agent. We'll try to get you work. But don't bug us about it.
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When the tabloids photograph me when I'm out, I always say: You know what, folks? I'm not married and I'm not gay. You caught me with a hot chick. You got me. Take me to hot-chick jail. Did it again. Guilty.
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Saying someone is religious is heard in most of America as a compliment, a reassuring affirmation that someone will be moral, ethical, and after a few glasses of wine, a freak in the bedroom.
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I think I know now why we are occupying Iraq. In case we have to sell America and move to a smaller country.
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Now people want Brian Williams to resign, but it could have a happy ending. Apparently what he said was such a blatant departure from the truth, today he got an offer from Fox News.
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How come regional pandering only works in one direction, right? You never see a Southern politician trying to win votes in New York State by saying, 'I read books and make a mean vegan meatloaf.'
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The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them.
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One of the reasons I still do stand-up is because it was so hard in the beginning that I feel like it would be such a shame not to redeem it that it's all fun.
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A cult is a cult, and that's what a frat is. A place where they strip you of your personality and rebuild it in their image.
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Only cowards push a button from thousands of miles away, or tens of thousands of feet up, to kill people who can't possibly fight back.
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We don't do sensible things. This is America.
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I never, ever in my life tried to be outrageous. I've only ever tried to say what was truly on my mind and not pull punches about it.
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