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Catholicism has changed tremendously in recent years. Now when Communion is served there is also a salad bar.
Bill Maher
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Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
Bars
Changed
Also
Tremendously
Years
Salad
Catholicism
Communion
Served
Recent
More quotes by Bill Maher
I'm staying in a strange hotel. I called room service for a sandwich and they sent up two hookers.
Bill Maher
The people [in the USA] are not very well informed. They certainly don`t know history. They certainly are not interested in foreign affairs very much, unless it comes right to their doorstep. They all learn history through wars. They learn geography through wars.
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Treason is when legislators vote against homeland security measures because it goes against the wishes of their political or financial backers. Treason is the fact that, as a terrorist, you could still buy a gun in this country because the NRA lobby is so strong.
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So when I say we had been the cowards, yes, that's what I meant, we as a society. And that's everybody, including myself. I had been screaming about the drug war and this war and other wars. I should have been more on terrorism, too. So should you, so should everybody.
Bill Maher
You'd know if I was the de-facto leader of the Democratic Party, because you'd go down to Walgreen's and buy a pack of blunts.
Bill Maher
Just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn't make you spiritual. It's right above the crack of your ass, and it translate to beef with broccoli. The last time you did anything spiritual, you were praying to God you weren't pregnant. You're not spiritual. You're just high.
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So many kids are fat drug addicts these days, it's almost as if Rush Limbaugh had puppies.
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We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels and free thinkers. It's overrun with sheep and conformists.
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I don't think George Bush is a good president by any imagination, but when he said, 'If you're talking to Al-Quaeda, we want to know what it's about,' it just proves one thing: If you're president long enough, you will one day say something that is true.
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This party is just full of children, and someone needs to leave them in a hot car.
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Sarah Palin has strong opinions on the Libyans. She said, 'Marriage is between a man and a woman and Libyans like Rachel Maddow are what's ruining this country.'
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I'll show you Obama's birth certificate when you show me Sarah Palin's high school diploma.
Bill Maher
I always compare marriage to communism. They're both institutions that don't conform to human nature, so you're going to end up with lying and hypocrisy.
Bill Maher
Stand-up is great because I can get everything off my chest.
Bill Maher
You can’t be a rational person six days a week and on one day of the week, go to a building, and think you are drinking the blood of a two thousand year old space god. That doesn’t make you a person of faith…, that makes you a schizophrenic.
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Don't you miss the days when America was just morally bankrupt?
Bill Maher
Do you want to know why marijuana is illegal? Because the drug companies want marijuana to be illegal. You see, if it came down to Prozak versus Marijuana, Prozak would lose.
Bill Maher
Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic.
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Don't say a woman is crazy just because she runs away from her wedding.
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Just be happy that something traveled 5,000 miles across the Pacific and, for once, it wasn't your job.
Bill Maher
