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One of the advantages of atheism is takes so little of your time.
Bill Maher
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Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
Time
Advantages
Atheism
Advantage
Takes
Religion
Littles
Little
More quotes by Bill Maher
The younger generation is supposed to rage against the machine, not for it. They're supposed to question authority, not question those who question authority.
Bill Maher
Tiger Woods apologized to the three women in America he never got around to sleeping with.
Bill Maher
Government - they used to teach it in college. It's actually something you should study and learn and know how to do. The Republicans always run on the idea that government isn't very effective. Well, not the way you do it. But it can be effective.
Bill Maher
Just be happy that something traveled 5,000 miles across the Pacific and, for once, it wasn't your job.
Bill Maher
Whenever the people are for gay marriage or medical marijuana or assisted suicide, suddenly the 'will of the people' goes out the window.
Bill Maher
I always compare marriage to communism. They're both institutions that don't conform to human nature, so you're going to end up with lying and hypocrisy.
Bill Maher
Maybe a president who didn't believe our soldiers were going to heaven might be a little less willing to get them killed.
Bill Maher
New polls show that Obama is now pulling away from Mitt Romney. And, of course, what could be more natural than to see Mitt Romney and pull away?
Bill Maher
What is Kanye West's message? Like most rap, I am the greatest person ever and you're not. I used to call it affirmative action for the ego.
Bill Maher
I never, ever in my life tried to be outrageous. I've only ever tried to say what was truly on my mind and not pull punches about it.
Bill Maher
France... What can you say about a country that was too stupid to get on board with our wonderfully-conceived and brilliantly-executed war in Iraq?
Bill Maher
The great thing about having been poor is how liberated it makes you if you eventually become rich. There's nothing like the knowledge that you don't need money to survive. That the money cushion you lie on every night doesn't have to be three feet thick, and you can still get to sleep.
Bill Maher
I said I didn't respect religion... and anyone who believes in fairy tales to answer questions that we can't answer... So I don't respect our religions either. But I do believe it is a clash of civilizations, absolutely, between the Islamic world and the Western world. It has been going on for 1,000 years.
Bill Maher
Well, I hate to tell youbut if you have a flu shot for more than five years in a row, there's ten times the likelihood that you'll get Alzheimer's disease.
Bill Maher
When you look at belief in such things - as do you go to heaven, is there a devil - we have more in common with (Muslin countries) Turkey and Iran and Syria than we do with European nations and Canada and nations that, yes, I would consider more enlightened that us.
Bill Maher
Stupidity is not another form of knowledge.
Bill Maher
Your taxes are due a week from today. You can make out your check directly to Halliburton. Or you can do what I'm going to do. I'm filing my first joint return. No, I'm not getting married, I'm sending the IRS an actual joint with a note that says, 'If you think I'm paying for this war, you must be high.'
Bill Maher
This party is just full of children, and someone needs to leave them in a hot car.
Bill Maher
Now people want Brian Williams to resign, but it could have a happy ending. Apparently what he said was such a blatant departure from the truth, today he got an offer from Fox News.
Bill Maher
We don't do sensible things. This is America.
Bill Maher