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One of the advantages of atheism is takes so little of your time.
Bill Maher
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Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
Takes
Religion
Littles
Little
Time
Advantages
Atheism
Advantage
More quotes by Bill Maher
Clinton left the White House with all the class of an XFL halftime show.
Bill Maher
Meat is dirty. I wouldn't touch a hot dog without a condom on it
Bill Maher
I was out at the HBO party, these are liberals, I imagine, and a lot of people came up to me and said, Keep giving it to the president.
Bill Maher
I'll show you Obama's birth certificate when you show me Sarah Palin's high school diploma.
Bill Maher
All across the Middle East in the streets, people are demanding democracy. It's amazing. The only way in America you get people to get worked up like that is to threaten to give them health care.
Bill Maher
The Senate decided they will be smoke-free. They ordained that all public areas in the Senate are now smoke-free. However, the senators themselves will still be allowed to blow smoke up each other's asses.
Bill Maher
A new biography came out that says that in high school Obama was a huge pothead … Mitt Romney had to respond to this and said, ‘It is appalling that Obama spent his teenage years goofing around and smoking pot when he should have been pinning down gay kids and cutting their hair.
Bill Maher
I always say to my religious friends, if a pool had even one turd in it, would you jump in?
Bill Maher
To me a real patriot is like a real friend. Who's your real friend? It's the person who tells you the truth. That's who my real friends are. So, you know, I think as far as our country goes, we need more people who will do that.
Bill Maher
Democrats are afraid of polls. Republicans aren`t afraid of polls. Republicans make polls. Democrats run from polls.
Bill Maher
Canadian bacon isn't bacon. It's ham.
Bill Maher
The Republicans proved they are not the party of 'no.' They're the party of 'f**k, no!'
Bill Maher
I'm okay with it now that Obama’s in office. I'm kind of trusting of him. But President Ted Cruz? Where this is going would bother me.
Bill Maher
Eell there always is a tendency in human nature to deify.
Bill Maher
To all conservative women out there: If you are so sure the embryo needed for stem cell research are precious human life that can't be destroyed, then implant one in your uterus and bring it to term. That's right, put your cervix where your mouth is.
Bill Maher
Now people want Brian Williams to resign, but it could have a happy ending. Apparently what he said was such a blatant departure from the truth, today he got an offer from Fox News.
Bill Maher
Trump is a little tone-deaf to the average American. He unveiled his slogan this week: 'Are you better off than you were four wives ago?'
Bill Maher
The true axis of evil in America is the brilliance of our marketing combined with the stupidity of our people.
Bill Maher
Tea Party has now cost the Republicans 5 senate seats. My next donation is going to them.
Bill Maher
That Mitt Romney, he is a master campaigner. This week he was introducing his wife, and he said, 'She is the heavyweight champion of my life.” Which may explain why on the ride home, he was strapped to the roof of the car.
Bill Maher