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The difference between a GOP convention and Comic-Con is that the people at Comic-Con have a much firmer grasp of reality.
Bill Maher
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Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
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Reality
Firmer
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Gop
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Conventions
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Difference
More quotes by Bill Maher
I'm worried about a permanent Republican majority. That's what I'm worried about for the future.
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I don't want to be a pessimist. I'm a realist. One man's realist is another man's pessimist.
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This is a ridiculous heat wave we're in right now, and to contribute, Newt Gingrich said that for the entire month of June, he will stop blowing hot air.
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Don't vote for Republicans or Democrats until they clean up the open system of bribery that we live under.
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New Rule: President Bush must stop acting like WE'RE the idiots. He gives speech after speech, and the theme is always the same 'What part of freedom don't you get, you morons?'. I'll answer that for you Mr. President. The part where you give it to people by blowing them up.
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Obama is huge in the polls these days. His popularity is soaring. Even conservatives are coming around. 30 percent of them now believe Obama deserves a Green Card.
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I don't think all life is precious. I know people say that all the time, Life is precious. I think some life is precious, and some life is just a waste of protoplasm. Start over.
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To those people who say, 'My father is alive because of animal experimentation,' I say, 'Yeah, well, good for you. This dog died so your father could live.' Sorry, but I am just not behind that kind of trade-off.
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Don't say a woman is crazy just because she runs away from her wedding.
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New Rule: Someone has to tell Francesco Schettino that embracing a callous policy of every man for himself doesn't make you a sea captain. It makes you the Republican nominee.
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A president can be unpopular for good reasons. You know, I'm not always on the side that the people are right, for God's sake. But, you know, he's not popular when he goes overseas. He couldn't go to Rosa Parks' funeral.
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If it weren't for acid, you might not have an IPod, and you definitely would not have some of the best music in your IPod.
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The media is all over this Oui interview that Arnold did 25 years ago. Now, he's admitted he smoked pot, had group sex and didn't mind dating a girl that was out of shape and kind of fat if she satisfied him sexually. So, his handlers have stopped comparing him to Reagan and started comparing him to Clinton.
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The Tea Baggers, they're not a movement, they're a cult.... Cults tend to populate from within, encouraging members to have huge broods of children and to give them strange names, like Moonbeam, and Trig.
Bill Maher
America is like a dog. I'm sorry, but it is. It cannot understand actual words. It understands inflection. It understands fear. But you can't actually explain issues to a dog.
Bill Maher
What a day for the Tea Party people. Did you see that? America's parks and fairgrounds were lost in a sea of man-boobs. They were venting their anger and rage against taxes, which, of course, in most cases for them went down. Protesting their taxes went down, but you know, why let the truth spoil a perfectly good Klan rally.
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I know climate change is a hoax – of course – but places that have never seen this type of winter weather got hit by it. More than a half a million southerners have been left in the dark --- and then the storm hit.
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So when I say we had been the cowards, yes, that's what I meant, we as a society. And that's everybody, including myself. I had been screaming about the drug war and this war and other wars. I should have been more on terrorism, too. So should you, so should everybody.
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Obama is not a secret Kenyon, or a secret Muslim, he's a secret Republican.
Bill Maher
A flu shot just compromises your immune system.
Bill Maher