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Look, I have never made a secret of the fact that I have tried marijuana... About 50,000 times.

Bill Maher

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Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
Secret
Fact
Times
Facts
Look
Looks
Marijuana
Made
Weed
Never
Tried

More quotes by Bill Maher

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America is like a dog. I'm sorry, but it is. It cannot understand actual words. It understands inflection. It understands fear. But you can't actually explain issues to a dog.
Bill Maher
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If you're living hand-to-mouth, and still buying into the con that the big threats to America are socialized medicine, Mexican immigrants and tax increases, then you're not being kept down by the rich. You're being kept down by you.
Bill Maher
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Recently, there's been a trend in America that I find very disturbing... rewarding immoral and illegal behavior...For example, we now give free needles to junkies, which seems to me to be only a step away from giving condoms to rapists.
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Don't vote for Republicans or Democrats until they clean up the open system of bribery that we live under.
Bill Maher
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A lot of people say they are dyslexic some have to realize that they are just stupid.
Bill Maher
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Republicans have become the party of red, white and blue rose colored glasses. By drowning out criticism with USA! USA!, they prevent this country from healing itself where it needs healing, and that is the opposite of Country First.
Bill Maher
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Democrats are afraid of polls. Republicans aren`t afraid of polls. Republicans make polls. Democrats run from polls.
Bill Maher
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To me a real patriot is like a real friend. Who's your real friend? It's the person who tells you the truth. That's who my real friends are. So, you know, I think as far as our country goes, we need more people who will do that.
Bill Maher
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We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying in the airplane when it hits the building, say what you want about it, it's not cowardly.
Bill Maher
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I don't respect religon. I don't respect superstitious thinking and that is what religous is.
Bill Maher
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The other guys are selling certainty. Not me. I'm on the corner with doubt.
Bill Maher
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Wichita Falls, Texas is considering using toilet water for drinking. And a dog there today said, 'White people's problems.'
Bill Maher
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Republicans say that sex is bad, because with them it always is. It is!...I'm sorry, but they're just doughy, asexual, wonky, white people, and if you had to have sex with them it would be over in an excruciating three minutes. It's just, - and from the headlines of the past year I gather the only sex they're really good at, is gay sex. Really.
Bill Maher
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As you go down the path of life, ask whats true. Not who else believes it.
Bill Maher
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Greed can overtake smart.
Bill Maher
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The president had a press conference about this this week and he said that the U.S. has no plans to attack North Korea. And then he added, 'Like having no plan ever stopped me before.'. He has something even more deadly in store for them - we're going to bring them democracy.
Bill Maher
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New polls show that Obama is now pulling away from Mitt Romney. And, of course, what could be more natural than to see Mitt Romney and pull away?
Bill Maher
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I urge the media to start referring to climate skeptics as what they really are: climate assholes.
Bill Maher
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New rule: If churches don't have to pay taxes, they also can't call the fire department when they catch fire. Sorry reverend, that's one of those services that goes along with paying in. I'll use the fire department I pay for. You can pray for rain.
Bill Maher
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Whenever the people are for gay marriage or medical marijuana or assisted suicide, suddenly the 'will of the people' goes out the window.
Bill Maher