Quote

Selling pot allowed me to get through college and make enough money to start off in comedy.

Bill Maher

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
Selling
Allowed
College
Comedy
Start
Money
Enough
Pot
Make
Marijuana

More quotes by Bill Maher

Image
Talk to women who've ever dated an Arab man. The results are not good.
Bill Maher
Image
Disneyland's a mess. And it's not just the measles. Donald Duck has bird flu. Pocahontas has small pox. The Little Mermaid has crabs. And the Monorail? Mono.
Bill Maher
Image
A flu shot just compromises your immune system.
Bill Maher
Image
The Republicans proved they are not the party of 'no.' They're the party of 'f**k, no!'
Bill Maher
Image
I get the Playboy thing a lot. People assume I go out with bimbos. I couldn`t go out with bimbos if I tried! I scare them off! The women that like me are smart. So I go to the Playboy Mansion four or five times a year, but people think I go all the time.
Bill Maher
Image
I think Democrats are complacent. They think that Russia is going to save us. Bob Mueller is going to come in with a report.
Bill Maher
Image
Doctors said that the test most commonly used to screen for colon cancer doesn't go far enough. They're recommending a procedure that involves photographing the entire colon. I say, don't vie CBS an idea for another reality show.
Bill Maher
Image
Only a Bush could answer a 'yes' or 'no' question two different ways and be wrong both times.
Bill Maher
Image
Tt just seems to be human nature to seem to want to posit in another human being, qualities that you must know, in part of your mind, that human being couldn't possess because you don't possess.
Bill Maher
Image
Clint Eastwood's speech was kind of a metaphor for the entire Republican Party: A confused old person yelling at something that doesn't exist.
Bill Maher
Image
Between Ron Paul and Rick Perry, I think the lesson is don't get sick in Texas.
Bill Maher
Image
Suicide is man's way of telling God, 'You can't fire me - I quit.'
Bill Maher
Image
Trump is a little tone-deaf to the average American. He unveiled his slogan this week: 'Are you better off than you were four wives ago?'
Bill Maher
Image
The great thing about having been poor is how liberated it makes you if you eventually become rich. There's nothing like the knowledge that you don't need money to survive. That the money cushion you lie on every night doesn't have to be three feet thick, and you can still get to sleep.
Bill Maher
Image
New Rule: News organizations have to stop using the phrase: We go beyond the headlines. That's your job, dummy. You don't see American Airlines saying, We land our jets on the runway!
Bill Maher
Image
New Rule: President Bush must stop acting like WE'RE the idiots. He gives speech after speech, and the theme is always the same 'What part of freedom don't you get, you morons?'. I'll answer that for you Mr. President. The part where you give it to people by blowing them up.
Bill Maher
Image
I think the news people no longer have any idea of what covering the news is.
Bill Maher
Image
Wichita Falls, Texas is considering using toilet water for drinking. And a dog there today said, 'White people's problems.'
Bill Maher
Image
Your taxes are due a week from today. You can make out your check directly to Halliburton. Or you can do what I'm going to do. I'm filing my first joint return. No, I'm not getting married, I'm sending the IRS an actual joint with a note that says, 'If you think I'm paying for this war, you must be high.'
Bill Maher
Image
I don't think George Bush is a good president by any imagination, but when he said, 'If you're talking to Al-Quaeda, we want to know what it's about,' it just proves one thing: If you're president long enough, you will one day say something that is true.
Bill Maher