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When opportunity knocks all some people can do is complain about the noise.

Bill Maher

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Bill Maher
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: January 20
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
New York City
New York
William Maher Jr.
William Maher
Knocks
Complain
Complaining
Noise
Opportunity
People

More quotes by Bill Maher

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A flu shot just compromises your immune system.
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Community is gathering around a fire and listening to someone tell a story.
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To paraphrase the great Will Rogers, El Rusho never met a pharmacist he did not like.
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Is it like gay men go into the priesthood because they figure, Well, this'll solve my problem. I can't be a homosexual in the priesthood it'll just go away. Maybe I'll try it with the Republican Party.
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Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.
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When I see the toothless guy, as a liberal, what I say is, 'I want to help you get teeth.' Why does that make me an a**hole?
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Hot women have to stop putting long paragraphs of text on their bodies. I know you think it's sexy but one thing that men never think is, Gee, you know what would make this sex better? Having something to read.
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Also, in the category of 'obvious but still shocking,' an animal called a 'killer whale' killed someone who was trying to play with it. Now, no one knows exactly what enraged the whale, but earlier in the week, it had been thrown off a flight by Southwest Airlines.
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I understand we're on our way to being a Third World country. Could we just stop at 'Second World' before we get there?
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George Bush says, 'Gore's book needs a lot of explaining.' Of course, Bush says that about every book.
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Have you ever met a war you didn't love? I’m asking, is there any place you don’t want to intervene in?
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Hi, I'm Bill. I'm a birth survivor.
Bill Maher
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What we don't know is about Jeb Bush and cocaine. But we do know that he did once had his brother Florida on a silver platter.
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I can't believe I'm saying this, but Obama looks like he DOES need a teleprompter.
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I think religion is a neurological disorder.
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If a President must constantly remind the people that we're at war, then we're not.
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Only a Bush could answer a 'yes' or 'no' question two different ways and be wrong both times.
Bill Maher
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If there is such a thing as karma, let's hope that Sarah Palin comes back as a wolf being shot at from a plane.
Bill Maher
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Some people think I enjoy debate. I don't. I wish everyone agreed with me it would save a lot of time.
Bill Maher
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They say that Japan's rigorous building codes and regulations saved thousands of lives over there. Or, as Republicans here saw it, it 'fostered a socialist, anti-business environment that's worse than being dead.'
Bill Maher