Quote

Ever notice that people who believe in creationism look really unevolved? Eyes real close together, big furry hands and feet. I believe God created me in one day. Yeah, looks like he rushed it.

Bill Hicks

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Bill Hicks
Age: 32 †
Born: 1961
Born: December 16
Died: 1994
Died: February 26
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Musician
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Writer
Valdosta
Georgia
William Melvin Hicks
Real
Feet
Creationism
Believe
Eyes
Furry
Really
Funny
Rushed
Like
Hands
Notice
People
Together
Yeah
Ever
Created
Look
Close
Looks
Humor

More quotes by Bill Hicks

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Smoking may cause fetal injury or premature birth. ... I found my brand. Just don't get the ones that say, Lung Cancer.
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Mushrooms grow on cow turds. I love that. I think that's why you giggle the first hour.
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I, like all artists in Western cultures, am a shaman...come in the guise of a comic...to heal perception by using...'jokes'.
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It is hard to quit smoking. Every one of them looks real good to me right about now. Every cigarette looks like it was made by God, rolled by Jesus and moistened shut with Claudia Schiffer's pussy.
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Just a simple choice, right now, between fear and love. The eyes of fear want you to put bigger locks on your doors, buy guns, close yourself off. The eyes of love instead see all of us as one.
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It's an insane world, and I'm proud to be a part of it.
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Oh my God. Lift me up out of this illusion, Lord. Heal my perception that I might know only reality and only you.
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I'm just skin covering coffee and some real nervous teeth.
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People often ask me where I stand politically. It's not that I disagree with Bush's economic policy or his foreign policy, it's that I believe he was a child of Satan sent here to destroy the planet Earth. Little to the left.
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It's you people dying from nothing that are screwed. I got all sorts of neat gadgets waiting for me...oxygen tent, iron lung.
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When you're...stepping over a guy on the sidewalk...does it ever occur to you to think, 'Wow. Maybe our system doesn't work?'
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Be yourself on stage. Nobody else can be you and you have the law of supply and demand covered.
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Laughter makes the bitter swallowing of truth, for some, a little easier.
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Marijuana: a drug that kills … no one – and let's put it in a time frame – ever. Illegal.
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If you are living for tomorrow, you will always be one day behind.
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It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's just hilarious.
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Courtroom for Ted Bundy's trial is packed with women, trying to meet him and give him love letters and wedding-fucking-proposals...and the first thought that enters my mind is, And I'm not getting laid. What am I doing wrong?
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I've had good times on drugs...bad times on drugs...But I've had good and bad relationships...and I'm not giving up pussy.
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I wouldn't give Satan a snowball's chance in Hell against a woman's ego.
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I began working quite young, writing, growing, maturing, always striving to top myself - to make people laugh hard at things they know and believe deep in their hearts to be true.
Bill Hicks